Pick
Pick

Pick

I Dont Want To
I Dont Want To

I Dont Want To

Socks
Socks

Socks

Sarcasmism
Sarcasmism

Sarcasmism

Regretment
Regretment

Regretment

Excits
Excits

Excits

Motheres
Motheres

Motheres

Drived
Drived

Drived

Sarcasm Only
Sarcasm Only

Sarcasm Only

So Wrong
So Wrong

So Wrong

馃敟 | Latest

Bruh, Christmas, and College: October 19 at 11:11am In highschool I wonder why they pushed college on so hard instead of trades? They didn't tell me union plumbers can make $1,600 a week with no OT and NO us DEGREE....or that truck drivers can make 6 bands a week if they buy their own truck w/NO DEGREE? OR that traveling welders can make 100k a year with NO DEGREE. they made it seem like college was the only way to be successful. Like Comment Share and 352 others 495 Shares J I'm a weld Inspector, traveling inspectors can make 6 figures easy. Oct 19 at 11:14am Love 2 Reply Delete plied 3 replies Jo NO That's awesome bro .I'm a truck driver and we can make 6 figures as well with the right company. I just wonder why they ain't tell me about this shit in highschool. They made it seem like college was the only way Oct 19 at 11:16am Edited Like 3 Reply More justgot1: apocalycious: halfmoonhead: themightyglamazon: systlin: roamingaimlesly: triggeredmedia: It鈥檚 almost as if schools push and ideology that benefits schools.聽 Bruh, trades are in high fucking demand right now too. Between now and 2020 there are suppose to be 300,000 more jobs and that鈥檚 just for welder. Shit, they鈥檒l pay for you to learn how to do it. I just finished high school and got a untility job in a factory and I have almost no experience. They鈥檙e gonna train me for everything plus it has full health benefits. Trades are fucking great. My husband is a welder, and is very very good at it. He got hired by a locksmith company pretty much just by walking in and going聽鈥淵es I can weld.鈥 All of the other guys there were great at locksmithing, but none of them were trained welders, and they needed someone who could build custom doors and frames.聽 They trained him to do lock stuff too, so now he can weld AND pick locks.聽 The owner of the company, when he handed out Christmas bonuses, looked at him and went聽鈥淒ude we literally cannot fire you because we鈥檇 be screwed so here鈥檚 your bonus and also we鈥檙e giving you a raise.鈥 Welders are in desperate demand.聽 Blows kisses to this post. Anyway, learn a trade, unionize, wear your PPE, memorize OSHA鈥檚 phone number. My husband went to a fast track auto school and made almost 80k at his last job. Benefits are shit if you鈥檙e in a trade with no union but the money can be really good There are construction projects here in Portland, OR that sit around taking months and months longer than they need to because there aren鈥檛 enough trades people for all the projects.聽 It鈥檚 interesting to drive past the same apartment building where nothing seems to be happening for like a year, and then suddenly in a few weeks it all seems to finish up at once. I see these posts a lot but I always wonder which trades have a lot of women and/or are friendly to women wanting to enter them? Because that鈥檚 still an issue in some trades.
Bruh, Christmas, and College: October 19 at 11:11am
 In highschool I wonder why they pushed college on
 so hard instead of trades? They didn't tell me union
 plumbers can make $1,600 a week with no OT and NO
 us
 DEGREE....or that truck drivers can make 6 bands a
 week if they buy their own truck w/NO DEGREE? OR
 that traveling welders can make 100k a year with NO
 DEGREE. they made it seem like college was the
 only way to be successful.
 Like
 Comment
 Share
 and 352 others
 495 Shares
 J
 I'm a weld Inspector, traveling inspectors can
 make 6 figures easy.
 Oct 19 at 11:14am Love 2 Reply Delete
 plied 3 replies
 Jo
 NO
 That's awesome bro
 .I'm a truck driver
 and we can make 6 figures as well with the right
 company. I just wonder why they ain't tell me
 about this shit in highschool. They made it
 seem like college was the only way
 Oct 19 at 11:16am Edited Like
 3 Reply More
justgot1:

apocalycious:
halfmoonhead:

themightyglamazon:

systlin:

roamingaimlesly:

triggeredmedia:

It鈥檚 almost as if schools push and ideology that benefits schools.聽

Bruh, trades are in high fucking demand right now too. Between now and 2020 there are suppose to be 300,000 more jobs and that鈥檚 just for welder.
Shit, they鈥檒l pay for you to learn how to do it.

I just finished high school and got a untility job in a factory and I have almost no experience. They鈥檙e gonna train me for everything plus it has full health benefits.
Trades are fucking great.

My husband is a welder, and is very very good at it. He got hired by a locksmith company pretty much just by walking in and going聽鈥淵es I can weld.鈥
All of the other guys there were great at locksmithing, but none of them were trained welders, and they needed someone who could build custom doors and frames.聽
They trained him to do lock stuff too, so now he can weld AND pick locks.聽
The owner of the company, when he handed out Christmas bonuses, looked at him and went聽鈥淒ude we literally cannot fire you because we鈥檇 be screwed so here鈥檚 your bonus and also we鈥檙e giving you a raise.鈥
Welders are in desperate demand.聽

Blows kisses to this post.

Anyway, learn a trade, unionize, wear your PPE, memorize OSHA鈥檚 phone number.  


My husband went to a fast track auto school and made almost 80k at his last job. Benefits are shit if you鈥檙e in a trade with no union but the money can be really good 

There are construction projects here in Portland, OR that sit around taking months and months longer than they need to because there aren鈥檛 enough trades people for all the projects.聽 It鈥檚 interesting to drive past the same apartment building where nothing seems to be happening for like a year, and then suddenly in a few weeks it all seems to finish up at once.


I see these posts a lot but I always wonder which trades have a lot of women and/or are friendly to women wanting to enter them? Because that鈥檚 still an issue in some trades.

justgot1: apocalycious: halfmoonhead: themightyglamazon: systlin: roamingaimlesly: triggeredmedia: It鈥檚 almost as if schools push and ...

Advice, Bad, and Cars: galexion: missanthrory: deathcomes4u: frommetrunui: frommetrunui: scaliefox: post-office-box-847: scaliefox: diarrheaworldstarhiphop: This is a serious issue though. Ferrai has this bullshit agreement that if you buy one of their cars new off the lot, you have to sign a contract saying you basically don鈥檛 own the car and have to uphold their brand standards with it. It鈥檚 sets a startling example of not owning something despite buying it and the court needs to use this as a chance to strike it down as unethical. This shit again? And I thought it was bad enough with ford and john deer telling farmers they didn鈥檛 own the tractors they bought from them鈥. Yeah, they have this really unethical clause in the purchase contract you can鈥檛 modify the car or do anything with it that they鈥檇 consider聽鈥渦nbecoming of the brand鈥, which is why they were able file this suit. It seems kind of bizarre at first until you realize how horrifying that is in the age of 鈥渄o you own what you buy?鈥 being a huge a debate (especially in tech). This is pretty much Ferrari鈥檚 philosophy from the start, they are extremely prideful of their cars like if they were made from God鈥檚 hands or something. They are very snobby, infact the owner of Ferrari doesn鈥檛 like the people who buy their cars since because they are bought for 鈥渟tatus鈥. They also never test their cars on public tracks in comparison with other racing cars like when they wanted to test out the Porche 918 Spyder vs The McLaren P1 vs LaFerrari. Take a guess who bailed out on the performance test. Just an update Lambo are the perfect people to jump in on this because they make insane cars and they are never above clowning them up because Lambo are all about THE DRAMA 鈩 It鈥檚 worth noting that Ferruccio Lamborghini, the founder of the company originally only made tractors. His company became successful and at some point he bought a Ferrari, but had a complaint with the car. He ended up taking this complaint to Enzo Ferrari, himself, who told the man he did not take advice from a mere tractor maker. Four months later the first Lamborghini sports was birthed out of pure spite. I鈥檇 like to this somewhere he鈥檚 enjoying this immensely.聽 FUCKING P U R R A R I
Advice, Bad, and Cars: galexion:

missanthrory:

deathcomes4u:

frommetrunui:

frommetrunui:

scaliefox:

post-office-box-847:

scaliefox:

diarrheaworldstarhiphop:

This is a serious issue though.
Ferrai has this bullshit agreement that if you buy one of their cars new off the lot, you have to sign a contract saying you basically don鈥檛 own the car and have to uphold their brand standards with it.
It鈥檚 sets a startling example of not owning something despite buying it and the court needs to use this as a chance to strike it down as unethical.

This shit again? And I thought it was bad enough with ford and john deer telling farmers they didn鈥檛 own the tractors they bought from them鈥.

Yeah, they have this really unethical clause in the purchase contract you can鈥檛 modify the car or do anything with it that they鈥檇 consider聽鈥渦nbecoming of the brand鈥, which is why they were able file this suit.
It seems kind of bizarre at first until you realize how horrifying that is in the age of 鈥渄o you own what you buy?鈥 being a huge a debate (especially in tech).

This is pretty much Ferrari鈥檚 philosophy from the start, they are extremely prideful of their cars like if they were made from God鈥檚 hands or something.

They are very snobby, infact the owner of Ferrari doesn鈥檛 like the people who buy their cars since because they are bought for 鈥渟tatus鈥.

They also never test their cars on public tracks in comparison with other racing cars like when they wanted to test out the Porche 918 Spyder vs The McLaren P1 vs LaFerrari. Take a guess who bailed out on the performance test.

Just an update

Lambo are the perfect people to jump in on this because they make insane cars and they are never above clowning them up because Lambo are all about THE DRAMA 鈩

It鈥檚 worth noting that Ferruccio Lamborghini, the founder of the company originally only made tractors. His company became successful and at some point he bought a Ferrari, but had a complaint with the car. He ended up taking this complaint to Enzo Ferrari, himself, who told the man he did not take advice from a mere tractor maker. Four months later the first Lamborghini sports was birthed out of pure spite. I鈥檇 like to this somewhere he鈥檚 enjoying this immensely.聽


FUCKING P U R R A R I

galexion: missanthrory: deathcomes4u: frommetrunui: frommetrunui: scaliefox: post-office-box-847: scaliefox: diarrheaworldstarhiphop...

Be Like, Life, and Mood: Anonymous 08/03/19(Sat)00:42:45 No.53711001 Simple. I want to kidnap a woman and transform her. I want to find some random frumpy woman and knock her out, take her to a secluded area and lock her 169 KB JPG underground. I don't want to hurt her or make her suffer; her room will be nice, she'll get three square meals a day, for all intents and purposes it'll be like a vacation. But every few weeks I'll knock her out with gas and she'll wake up with some new operation done. Whether it be implants, lipo, or anything plastic surgery related I'll do this over the course of 6 months to a year, having her write in a diary about her new body and how she's learning to live with it. By the end she'll look nothing like what she used to, depending on my mood she might have gigantic beshine tits, or maybe a wasp waist. Either way I'll throw her back into the wild to live the rest of her life in a body that isn't hers and start over with a new girl. black-in-kansas: edgarallenbroe: the-mighty-birdy: supreme-leader-stoat: the-mighty-birdy: officialfist: WELL IF THIS AIN鈥橳 THE MOST HORRIFYING THING I鈥橵E READ IN A WHILE You鈥檇 think with the fact CyberSmith is literally under criminal investigation for child image content violation he鈥檇 think it not wise to act so debauched on Tumblr. He doesn鈥檛 strike me as the wise type. Me: Let鈥檚 see what鈥檚 going on with Tumblr todayFirst thing I see: *This shit*Me:
Be Like, Life, and Mood: Anonymous
 08/03/19(Sat)00:42:45 No.53711001
 Simple. I want to kidnap a woman
 and transform her. I want to find
 some random frumpy woman and
 knock her out, take her to a
 secluded area and lock her
 169 KB JPG
 underground. I don't want to hurt her
 or make her suffer; her room will be nice, she'll get
 three square meals a day, for all intents and
 purposes it'll be like a vacation. But every few
 weeks I'll knock her out with gas and she'll wake up
 with some new operation done. Whether it be
 implants, lipo, or anything plastic surgery related
 I'll do this over the course of 6 months to a year,
 having her write in a diary about her new body and
 how she's learning to live with it. By the end she'll
 look nothing like what she used to, depending on
 my mood she might have gigantic beshine tits, or
 maybe a wasp waist. Either way I'll throw her back
 into the wild to live the rest of her life in a body that
 isn't hers and start over with a new girl.
black-in-kansas:

edgarallenbroe:

the-mighty-birdy:
supreme-leader-stoat:


the-mighty-birdy:

officialfist:



WELL IF THIS AIN鈥橳 THE MOST HORRIFYING THING I鈥橵E READ IN A WHILE




You鈥檇 think with the fact CyberSmith is literally under criminal investigation for child image content violation he鈥檇 think it not wise to act so debauched on Tumblr.

He doesn鈥檛 strike me as the wise type.

Me: Let鈥檚 see what鈥檚 going on with Tumblr todayFirst thing I see: *This shit*Me:

black-in-kansas: edgarallenbroe: the-mighty-birdy: supreme-leader-stoat: the-mighty-birdy: officialfist: WELL IF THIS AIN鈥橳 THE MOST...

Shit, Target, and Tumblr: shiny-rhydon: thatpettyblackgirl: How the hell this shit is the new鈥
Shit, Target, and Tumblr: shiny-rhydon:
thatpettyblackgirl:


How the hell



this shit is the new鈥

shiny-rhydon: thatpettyblackgirl: How the hell this shit is the new鈥

Facebook, Omg, and Saw: Red @redgermz Saw this on Facebook and sent it to my brother, who is a pharmacist. Unsa man na b 10:29 AM Paracetamol OMG pseudonymsobriquet: klubbhead: halcyonjester: xmagnet-o: cfluffiness: Someone in facebook also posted this too Omg Mediglyphics This shit鈥檚 infuriating Oh, this is a type of shorthand! There are 3 main types, but from my research, this looks to be American Gregg Shorthand. As you can see, there are set symbols for every letter. Let鈥檚 break one of the words down: Using the Gregg Alphabet as reference, we can see most of the letters in 鈥渁trophied鈥 are present. But why no 鈥渙鈥 vowel, and why is 鈥減h鈥 written as 鈥渇鈥? Simple. In shorthand, you cut out all vowels in a word when writing it down, with the exception of words that BEGIN or END with a vowel (hence the 鈥渁鈥 at the start being present), or like in the 鈥渋鈥 in 鈥渁trophied鈥, to make it more readable when the sound could be harder to distinguish if it isn鈥檛 written. In 鈥渁trophied鈥 if the the 鈥渋鈥 isn鈥檛 written, it could be hard to tell if the writer meant a 鈥渇ud鈥, 鈥渇ad鈥, 鈥渇od鈥 or 鈥渇id鈥 sound, for example. Also, since Shorthand is a phonetic writing system, you are encouraged to write down the phonetic sounds of words rather than the actual letter blends - in this case, write an 鈥渇鈥 instead of a 鈥減h鈥. So in actuality, these aren鈥檛 just meaningless scribbles - it鈥檚 Gregg Shorthand, a writing system developed to take down notes more quickly than when written out in full, which is very useful in a medical or journalistic environment. Some people can even write over 100 words in a minute! And, it鈥檚 been in use since John Robert Gregg invented it in 1888! Wow! So old! Isn鈥檛 language amazing~? Ya ten茅is traductor.
Facebook, Omg, and Saw: Red
 @redgermz
 Saw this on Facebook and sent it to
 my brother, who is a pharmacist.
 Unsa man na b
 10:29 AM
 Paracetamol
 OMG
pseudonymsobriquet:

klubbhead:

halcyonjester:


xmagnet-o:

cfluffiness:


Someone in facebook also posted this too


Omg

Mediglyphics


This shit鈥檚 infuriating

Oh, this is a type of shorthand! 
There are 3 main types, but from my research, this looks to be American Gregg Shorthand.


As you can see, there are set symbols for every letter. 
Let鈥檚 break one of the words down:
Using the Gregg Alphabet as reference, we can see most of the letters in 鈥渁trophied鈥 are present. But why no 鈥渙鈥 vowel, and why is 鈥減h鈥 written as 鈥渇鈥? 
Simple. In shorthand, you cut out all vowels in a word when writing it down, with the exception of words that BEGIN or END with a vowel (hence the 鈥渁鈥 at the start being present), or like in the 鈥渋鈥 in 鈥渁trophied鈥, to make it more readable when the sound could be harder to distinguish if it isn鈥檛 written. In 鈥渁trophied鈥 if the the 鈥渋鈥 isn鈥檛 written, it could be hard to tell if the writer meant a 鈥渇ud鈥, 鈥渇ad鈥, 鈥渇od鈥 or 鈥渇id鈥 sound, for example.
Also, since Shorthand is a phonetic writing system, you are encouraged to write down the phonetic sounds of words rather than the actual letter blends - in this case, write an 鈥渇鈥 instead of a 鈥減h鈥. 
So in actuality, these aren鈥檛 just meaningless scribbles - it鈥檚 Gregg Shorthand, a writing system developed to take down notes more quickly than when written out in full, which is very useful in a medical or journalistic environment. 
Some people can even write over 100 words in a minute! And, it鈥檚 been in use since John Robert Gregg invented it in 1888! Wow! So old!
Isn鈥檛 language amazing~? 

Ya ten茅is traductor.

pseudonymsobriquet: klubbhead: halcyonjester: xmagnet-o: cfluffiness: Someone in facebook also posted this too Omg Mediglyphics ...

Crazy, Fucking, and Funny: Donatello/Michelangelo kittyknowsthings: friendlylycanthrope: ao3tagoftheday: ethermaster: ao3tagoftheday: [Image Description: Tag reading 鈥渄onatello/michelangelo鈥漖 The AO3 Tag of the Day is: Renaissance fanart I鈥檓 gonna let you in on a secret. That aint renaissance fanart You know what, assholes? I run this blog for y'all every day. I see things you cannot begin to imagine. I have to read people鈥檚 Robespierre smut and their questions about how various monsters would fuck them. I am so jaded that, when someone submits a tag mentioning some random vaguely liquid substance without context, I just assume it鈥檚 being used as lube. Nutella? Lube. Crazy glue? Lube. Divine fucking ichor? Fucking lube! I do this for you, y'all. I shield you from this shit. I stand athwart the tides of horror, hold my hands up, and yell 鈥淪TOP鈥 in the hopes that it will keep the waters from reaching you. So you know what, fuckheads!? If I want to maintain the one tiny scrap of innocence I have left, I will. The official policy of AO3TagoftheDay is now that turtles, teenage, mutant, ninja, or otherwise, do not fuck. It never happens. They don鈥檛 fuck. They don鈥檛 fuck each other. They don鈥檛 fuck humans. They don鈥檛 fuck in real life and they don鈥檛 fuck in fiction. This tag is about two gay Renaissance painters holding each other close and kissing chastely under the Sistine chapel ceiling. There. Glad we got that sorted out. Please return to your regularly scheduled programming. Ao3tagoftheday finally snapped I don鈥檛 know why this is so funny but I鈥檓 laughing to the point of tears
Crazy, Fucking, and Funny: Donatello/Michelangelo
kittyknowsthings:
friendlylycanthrope:

ao3tagoftheday:

ethermaster:

ao3tagoftheday:


[Image Description: Tag reading 鈥渄onatello/michelangelo鈥漖

The AO3 Tag of the Day is: Renaissance fanart 


I鈥檓 gonna let you in on a secret.
That aint renaissance fanart
You know what, assholes? I run this blog for y'all every day. I see things you cannot begin to imagine. I have to read people鈥檚 Robespierre smut and their questions about how various monsters would fuck them. I am so jaded that, when someone submits a tag mentioning some random vaguely liquid substance without context, I just assume it鈥檚 being used as lube. Nutella? Lube. Crazy glue? Lube. Divine fucking ichor? Fucking lube! I do this for you, y'all. I shield you from this shit. I stand athwart the tides of horror, hold my hands up, and yell 鈥淪TOP鈥 in the hopes that it will keep the waters from reaching you.
So you know what, fuckheads!? If I want to maintain the one tiny scrap of innocence I have left, I will. The official policy of AO3TagoftheDay is now that turtles, teenage, mutant, ninja, or otherwise, do not fuck. It never happens. They don鈥檛 fuck. They don鈥檛 fuck each other. They don鈥檛 fuck humans. They don鈥檛 fuck in real life and they don鈥檛 fuck in fiction. This tag is about two gay Renaissance painters holding each other close and kissing chastely under the Sistine chapel ceiling.
There. Glad we got that sorted out. Please return to your regularly scheduled programming.


Ao3tagoftheday finally snapped

I don鈥檛 know why this is so funny but I鈥檓 laughing to the point of tears

kittyknowsthings: friendlylycanthrope: ao3tagoftheday: ethermaster: ao3tagoftheday: [Image Description: Tag reading 鈥渄onatello/michelan...

Cats, Chicago, and Clock: The Independent @Independent Here's what you should do in the event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/ 2piOhjW 8/9/17, 3:19 PM NBC News @NBCNews NBC NEWS "Don't run. Get inside". What experts say to do in case of a nuclear attack nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt 8/9/17, 9:30 AM CN CNN @CNN Hawaii is preparing in case of a North Korea attack. Experts say you have about 15 min. to take cover after a launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9 taraljc: lemonsharks: nikkoliferous: biggest-goldiest-spoon: zoanzon: missmwynter: madlyinlov3onda: oakenroots: oakenroots: quietrain: shesheistyy: tripprophet: weavemama: ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the聽鈥渋n case a nuclear attack happens鈥 phase鈥︹. [x] This shit is wild. Wtf a table finna do for anybody?? There鈥檚 basically nothing you can do but die they鈥檙e doing this to give people a sense of safety , even though we full well know this won鈥檛 work at all. ALRIGHT KIDDOS LISTEN UP! I did emergency management for the air force which involves this fun thing called Plume Modelling (aka chart the path of death for a given bomb based on its payload, distance, type of detonation, etc) and let me tell you some actual LEGIT鈩 methods of minimizing damage to your life. Unless you are within the vaporization zone (where you turn into a fucking shadow because of your proximity to the blast) there is a specific order of events nuke blasts cause and there are ways to protect against these things. 1. There is this thing called a flash to bang ratio. It is really freaking important. The first wave from a nuke is a blinding flash of light that can literally FRY YOUR RETINAS. If you believe that a nuke has just dropped on your city, HIDE AND DONT LOOK AT IT. @shesheistyy a good solid table is good for this but you鈥檙e way less likely to go blind if you get to an internal room with no windows, especially one below ground. 2. After the flash there will be the bang. If the time between the flash and the bang, counted in Mississippi seconds, is more than 10 seconds you MIGHT survive and just die of cancer later. If it鈥檚 between five and 10 buckle up kiddos because the worst is yet to come. And well if it鈥檚 less than 3 you won鈥檛 live long enough to remember this. These are loose estimates only. 3. The 鈥渂ang鈥 usually announces the arrival of the fire ball. Yes. A massive heat shock will erupt from the core of the bomb and light pretty much every thing it comes into contact with, including your flesh, on fire. Back to that whole 鈥渕etal buildings underground鈥 thing. There鈥檚 really no getting around the whole getting lit on fire if you鈥檙e too close thing. 4. Fallout. When the bomb goes off it sucks all of the shit it just vaporized up into the air with it and as the blast cools, it begins to rain down the radioactive fucked molten wreckage onto everyone in a huge radius. Just because the fallout you can see has stopped doesn鈥檛 mean the molecular radiation has stopped. The survival factors for nuclear blasts are time, distance and shielding. The longer it takes for it to get to you the less of it there is. The further away from the source the less dead you are. Want to survive? Put 6 feet of concrete and/or 2 feet of lead between you and everything else. Yes. Those loons with their bunkers actually got something right. NOW! About radiation! If you are so fortunate as to survive one of these blasts and not be vaporized or burnt to a crisp or die of radiation poisoning within hours, you need to understand the types of radiation. Gamma radiation is the most 鈥渟evere鈥 in that it can penetrate your flesh through your clothes and house, causing severe illness. Gamma radiation fucks with your cell walls and disrupts your DNA. It kills you in hours, months or years. Some people survive decades. Think of gamma like the sun. Too much exposure gives you cancer. Now Beta, on the other hand, think of Beta particles like sand on the beach. Its in the air. Its in your clothes, in the creases of your fingers. But beta particles can burn through your flesh or get into your blood stream through open wounds. Luckily they can be stopped with nonporous materials, like rubber, or foil. Make that two points for the loony conspiracy theorists. Aluminum foil does protect from beta radiation. And finally, Alpha radiation. Think of alpha Radiation like dust motes. It takes a high density filter to prevent you from breathing them in and if you鈥檙e surrounded by rubble they鈥檙e probably everywhere. Alpha particles do the same thing as beta particles in terms of getting into your system and wrecking your shit. So! Survival? Most likely based on dumb luck. But! If you think you鈥檙e being nuked 1. get under ground or at least to an internal room of the building if no other options are available. 2. CLOSE YOUR EYES. Curl into the fetal position to protect your orifices and vital organs from gamma radiation and get low to the ground to reduce damage from the blast and potential ceiling collapse. 3.You will still feel the flash pass over you. Count. One, two, three鈥 If you aren鈥檛 vaporized yet keep counting. Pray to every god ever imagined that you get to 10 before you hear the bang. 4. Bang. Try not to shit yourself. The fireball will follow almost instantly if you鈥檙e in range. Be prepared to start rolling to put yourself out. 5. Fallout rains down. Do not open your eyes. Do not stop praying. As hard as it is because time will feel as if it has slowed to a crawl, try not to leave your position for at least 30 minutes, although 60 minutes is better. At 30 minutes, only 60% of the potential fall out has fallen but by 60 minutes, up to 90% may have come down. 6. Remember, Alpha and beta radiation are particles. Do not put anything in your body that has not been thoroughly washed, dusted of or came from a sealed package. Point 3 for the conspiracy theorists, hot pockets and canned food are probably still safe. Do not leave shelter without goggles, and try to wrap yourself in a minimum of those weird space blankets but rubber and metal lined suits (like hazmat suits) are best for the job. Good luck in the future apocalypse! Reblogged with improved readability! Look whats Relevant again鈥 I wonder if there鈥檚 any where to watch White Light, Black Rain. Saw it back in highschool. History repeats and all that jazz. After all,聽It鈥檚 not like聽鈥榙uck and cover鈥 and other nuclear protection methods of dubious quality聽weren鈥檛 a mainstream in the Cold War or anything鈥 We鈥檝e been here before. It鈥檚 just the first time around for us younger crowd. Stay safe. Reminder that according to the Doomsday Clock, we are currently at greater threat of nuclear annihilation than we were even at the height of the Cold War. Nukemap for 鈥渉ow far from ground zero must I be to survive this鈥 https://nuclearsecrecy.com/nukemap/ Like鈥 Manhattan might be toast but that doesn鈥檛 mean the citizens of Long Island shouldn鈥檛 know how to mitigate their terrible fuckin situation just because Manhattan is toast. If downtown Chicago is at the center of a nuclear bombing when I鈥檓 at work I鈥檓 dead, but if I鈥檓 home I have a chance to shelter in place and then bag up the cats and go crash with friends in Wisconsin. And also how absofuckinglutely horrifying is it that we need to know this shit? very absofuckingluteky horrifying
Cats, Chicago, and Clock: The Independent
 @Independent
 Here's what you should do in the
 event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/
 2piOhjW
 8/9/17, 3:19 PM

 NBC News
 @NBCNews
 NBC NEWS
 "Don't run. Get inside". What experts
 say to do in case of a nuclear attack
 nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt
 8/9/17, 9:30 AM

 CN
 CNN
 @CNN
 Hawaii is preparing in case of a North
 Korea attack. Experts say you have
 about 15 min. to take cover after a
 launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9
taraljc:

lemonsharks:


nikkoliferous:

biggest-goldiest-spoon:

zoanzon:

missmwynter:

madlyinlov3onda:

oakenroots:

oakenroots:


quietrain:

shesheistyy:

tripprophet:


weavemama:

ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the聽鈥渋n case a nuclear attack happens鈥 phase鈥︹. [x]

This shit is wild.


Wtf a table finna do for anybody?? There鈥檚 basically nothing you can do but die

they鈥檙e doing this to give people a sense of safety , even though we full well know this won鈥檛 work at all.

ALRIGHT KIDDOS LISTEN UP! I did emergency management for the air force which involves this fun thing called Plume Modelling (aka chart the path of death for a given bomb based on its payload, distance, type of detonation, etc) and let me tell you some actual LEGIT鈩 methods of minimizing damage to your life. 
Unless you are within the vaporization zone (where you turn into a fucking shadow because of your proximity to the blast) there is a specific order of events nuke blasts cause and there are ways to protect against these things.

1. There is this thing called a flash to bang ratio. It is really freaking important. The first wave from a nuke is a blinding flash of light that can literally FRY YOUR RETINAS. If you believe that a nuke has just dropped on your city, HIDE AND DONT LOOK AT IT. @shesheistyy a good solid table is good for this but you鈥檙e way less likely to go blind if you get to an internal room with no windows, especially one below ground. 
2. After the flash there will be the bang. If the time between the flash and the bang, counted in Mississippi seconds, is more than 10 seconds you MIGHT survive and just die of cancer later. If it鈥檚 between five and 10 buckle up kiddos because the worst is yet to come. And well if it鈥檚 less than 3 you won鈥檛 live long enough to remember this. These are loose estimates only. 
3. The 鈥渂ang鈥 usually announces the arrival of the fire ball. Yes. A massive heat shock will erupt from the core of the bomb and light pretty much every thing it comes into contact with, including your flesh, on fire. Back to that whole 鈥渕etal buildings underground鈥 thing. There鈥檚 really no getting around the whole getting lit on fire if you鈥檙e too close thing. 
4. Fallout. When the bomb goes off it sucks all of the shit it just vaporized up into the air with it and as the blast cools, it begins to rain down the radioactive fucked molten wreckage onto everyone in a huge radius. Just because the fallout you can see has stopped doesn鈥檛 mean the molecular radiation has stopped. 

The survival factors for nuclear blasts are time, distance and shielding. The longer it takes for it to get to you the less of it there is. The further away from the source the less dead you are. Want to survive? Put 6 feet of concrete and/or 2 feet of lead between you and everything else. Yes. Those loons with their bunkers actually got something right. 

NOW! About radiation! If you are so fortunate as to survive one of these blasts and not be vaporized or burnt to a crisp or die of radiation poisoning within hours, you need to understand the types of radiation. 

Gamma radiation is the most 鈥渟evere鈥 in that it can penetrate your flesh through your clothes and house, causing severe illness. Gamma radiation fucks with your cell walls and disrupts your DNA. It kills you in hours, months or years. Some people survive decades. Think of gamma like the sun. Too much exposure gives you cancer. 

Now Beta, on the other hand, think of Beta particles like sand on the beach. Its in the air. Its in your clothes, in the creases of your fingers. But beta particles can burn through your flesh or get into your blood stream through open wounds. Luckily they can be stopped with nonporous materials, like rubber, or foil. Make that two points for the loony conspiracy theorists. Aluminum foil does protect from beta radiation. 

And finally, Alpha radiation. Think of alpha Radiation like dust motes. It takes a high density filter to prevent you from breathing them in and if you鈥檙e surrounded by rubble they鈥檙e probably everywhere. Alpha particles do the same thing as beta particles in terms of getting into your system and wrecking your shit. 

So! Survival? Most likely based on dumb luck. But! If you think you鈥檙e being nuked
1. get under ground or at least to an internal room of the building if no other options are available. 
2. CLOSE YOUR EYES. Curl into the fetal position to protect your orifices and vital organs from gamma radiation and get low to the ground to reduce damage from the blast and potential ceiling collapse. 
3.You will still feel the flash pass over you. Count. One, two, three鈥 If you aren鈥檛 vaporized yet keep counting. Pray to every god ever imagined that you get to 10 before you hear the bang. 
4. Bang. Try not to shit yourself. The fireball will follow almost instantly if you鈥檙e in range. Be prepared to start rolling to put yourself out. 
5. Fallout rains down. Do not open your eyes. Do not stop praying. As hard as it is because time will feel as if it has slowed to a crawl, try not to leave your position for at least 30 minutes, although 60 minutes is better. At 30 minutes, only 60% of the potential fall out has fallen but by 60 minutes, up to 90% may have come down. 
6. Remember, Alpha and beta radiation are particles. Do not put anything in your body that has not been thoroughly washed, dusted of or came from a sealed package. Point 3 for the conspiracy theorists, hot pockets and canned food are probably still safe. Do not leave shelter without goggles, and try to wrap yourself in a minimum of those weird space blankets but rubber and metal lined suits (like hazmat suits) are best for the job. 

Good luck in the future apocalypse!


Reblogged with improved readability!

Look whats Relevant again鈥


I wonder if there鈥檚 any where to watch White Light, Black Rain. Saw it back in highschool.

History repeats and all that jazz.
After all,聽It鈥檚 not like聽鈥榙uck and cover鈥 and other nuclear protection methods of dubious quality聽weren鈥檛 a mainstream in the Cold War or anything鈥
We鈥檝e been here before.
It鈥檚 just the first time around for us younger crowd.


Stay safe. 

Reminder that according to the Doomsday Clock, we are currently at greater threat of nuclear annihilation than we were even at the height of the Cold War.


Nukemap for 鈥渉ow far from ground zero must I be to survive this鈥
https://nuclearsecrecy.com/nukemap/
Like鈥 Manhattan might be toast but that doesn鈥檛 mean the citizens of Long Island shouldn鈥檛 know how to mitigate their terrible fuckin situation just because Manhattan is toast.
If downtown Chicago is at the center of a nuclear bombing when I鈥檓 at work I鈥檓 dead, but if I鈥檓 home I have a chance to shelter in place and then bag up the cats and go crash with friends in Wisconsin.
And also how absofuckinglutely horrifying is it that we need to know this shit?


very absofuckingluteky horrifying

taraljc: lemonsharks: nikkoliferous: biggest-goldiest-spoon: zoanzon: missmwynter: madlyinlov3onda: oakenroots: oakenroots: quiet...