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Told

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I Have

I Have

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Adopted

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🔥 | Latest

Advice, Being Alone, and America: Anna Breslaw @annabreslavw My sister is doing arn experiment: Whenever men walk towards her, she doesn't move out of the way first. So far she has collided with 28 men. 12/13/14, 5:04 PNM marithlizard: taraljc: seperis: sapphic-pink-kryptonite: phoenixonwheels: linkedsoul: little-miss-stan: elegantmess100: blossombarnes: retroasgardian: reddobastard: onethingconstant: songbirde108: mercurialkitty: emmagrant01: clevermanka: youcangofindatree: moremetalthanyourmom: Okay but after seeing this I started doing it too and it’s amazing how many men I’ve run into bc they expected me to move Gotta try it I work (and walk) on a college campus. I’ve lost count of how many men I’ve smacked shoulders with. Recently, I was standing outside my son’s classroom waiting to talk to his teacher. I stood on one side of the hallway, not even close to the center. At some point, a man came walking along. I was standing right in his path, but the hallway was empty, so I logically expected him to swerve around me. Instead he kept walking right toward me, got to me, and stopped, as if waiting for me to get out of his way. I didn’t; I just smiled politely at him. He finally walked around me, clearly annoyed that I hadn’t leapt out of his manly path. Now I’m wishing I’d leapt aside, taken off my jacket and laid it on the floor before him, then bowed deeply and said, “My Liege!” I also work at a college campus. I smack shoulders sometimes, but I find that if I stare straight ahead and follow the advice below, people get the heck out of the way. Honestly this post changed how I carry myself when walking alone in public, or in a situation where I’m the one leading. People definitely move for the murder gaze. Confirmed. I once had to rush back inside a convention hall as the con was closing in order to a retrieve a sick friend’s medication, and I didn’t understand why people in the crowd were jumping out of my way (literally—one guy vaulted a table) until I realized I was dressed as the Winter Soldier and doing the Murder Walk because that’s just how I walk in those boots. I got the meds, got out, and made a mental note. I repeated the experiment later, wearing the boots but otherwise my usual clothing and mimicking the expression I thought I’d had at that moment. People parted like I was Charlton Heston. I now wear that style of boots whenever possible. I recently had a man do a double-take as I walked by and ask me, politely, where I had served because I “looked like a soldier.” I’m not current or former military. I was wearing a flowy purple peasant top and looked as un-soldierlike as possible. Moral of the story: wear comfortable shoes, square your shoulders, and walk like you’ve been sent to murder Captain America. WALK LIKE YOU’VE BEEN SENT TO MURDER CAPTAIN AMERICA It’s called the Murder Strut. IT’S BACK!!!!!! I was searching for this to show my daughter the other day and couldn’t find it. I’m so glad IT’S BACK!! I will always reblog the Murder Strut!! A guy on a bike went around me because he could tell I had no intention of moving. Thanks to this post. One day and I bumped into a guy while doing the Murder Strut and he apologized to me even though I was the one who had bumped into him. It works wonders. In case you were wondering, yes you can do this in a wheelchair. Same look in your eyes and let ‘em know you will run them down. Just picture yourself in a sports car accelerating towards someone with the intention of flattening them. If there’s anything more satisfying than watching Abled men leap out of my way when they realize I’m not moving for them, I can’t think of it atm. Walk like you’ve been sent to murder Captain America. Wheel like you’re gonna win the Indy 500 and don’t care how. Your crutches are short swords; walk like you can see them buried in the bodies of anyone who crosses (in front of) you. Tumblr: teaching women how to be Moses and part the fucking Red Sea with the power of their minds. I had never seen these updates to the Patriarchy Chicken Game before and they are all a goddam DELIGHT Patriarchy Chicken and The Murder Strut, dance names for the new millenium. 
Advice, Being Alone, and America: Anna Breslaw
 @annabreslavw
 My sister is doing arn
 experiment: Whenever men
 walk towards her, she doesn't
 move out of the way first. So
 far she has collided with 28
 men.
 12/13/14, 5:04 PNM
marithlizard:

taraljc:

seperis:


sapphic-pink-kryptonite:

phoenixonwheels:

linkedsoul:

little-miss-stan:

elegantmess100:


blossombarnes:

retroasgardian:


reddobastard:

onethingconstant:


songbirde108:


mercurialkitty:


emmagrant01:


clevermanka:


youcangofindatree:


moremetalthanyourmom:

Okay but after seeing this I started doing it too and it’s amazing how many men I’ve run into bc they expected me to move

Gotta try it


I work (and walk) on a college campus. I’ve lost count of how many men I’ve smacked shoulders with.


Recently, I was standing outside my son’s classroom waiting to talk to his teacher. I stood on one side of the hallway, not even close to the center. At some point, a man came walking along. I was standing right in his path, but the hallway was empty, so I logically expected him to swerve around me. Instead he kept walking right toward me, got to me, and stopped, as if waiting for me to get out of his way. I didn’t; I just smiled politely at him. He finally walked around me, clearly annoyed that I hadn’t leapt out of his manly path. 
Now I’m wishing I’d leapt aside, taken off my jacket and laid it on the floor before him, then bowed deeply and said, “My Liege!”


I also work at a college campus. I smack shoulders sometimes, but I find that if I stare straight ahead and follow the advice below, people get the heck out of the way.


Honestly this post changed how I carry myself when walking alone in public, or in a situation where I’m the one leading. People definitely move for the murder gaze.


Confirmed. I once had to rush back inside a convention hall as the con was closing in order to a retrieve a sick friend’s medication, and I didn’t understand why people in the crowd were jumping out of my way (literally—one guy vaulted a table) until I realized I was dressed as the Winter Soldier and doing the Murder Walk because that’s just how I walk in those boots. I got the meds, got out, and made a mental note.
I repeated the experiment later, wearing the boots but otherwise my usual clothing and mimicking the expression I thought I’d had at that moment. People parted like I was Charlton Heston.
I now wear that style of boots whenever possible. I recently had a man do a double-take as I walked by and ask me, politely, where I had served because I “looked like a soldier.” I’m not current or former military. I was wearing a flowy purple peasant top and looked as un-soldierlike as possible.
Moral of the story: wear comfortable shoes, square your shoulders, and walk like you’ve been sent to murder Captain America.


WALK LIKE YOU’VE BEEN SENT TO MURDER CAPTAIN AMERICA




It’s called the Murder Strut.

IT’S BACK!!!!!! I was searching for this to show my daughter the other day and couldn’t find it. I’m so glad IT’S BACK!! I will always reblog the Murder Strut!!


A guy on a bike went around me because he could tell I had no intention of moving. Thanks to this post. 

One day and I bumped into a guy while doing the Murder Strut and he apologized to me even though I was the one who had bumped into him.
It works wonders.


In case you were wondering, yes you can do this in a wheelchair. Same look in your eyes and let ‘em know you will run them down. Just picture yourself in a sports car accelerating towards someone with the intention of flattening them. 
If there’s anything more satisfying than watching Abled men leap out of my way when they realize I’m not moving for them, I can’t think of it atm. 


Walk like you’ve been sent to murder Captain America.
Wheel like you’re gonna win the Indy 500 and don’t care how.
Your crutches are short swords; walk like you can see them buried in the bodies of anyone who crosses (in front of) you.
Tumblr: teaching women how to be Moses and part the fucking Red Sea with the power of their minds.


I had never seen these updates to the Patriarchy Chicken Game before and they are all a goddam DELIGHT

Patriarchy Chicken and The Murder Strut, dance names for the new millenium. 

marithlizard: taraljc: seperis: sapphic-pink-kryptonite: phoenixonwheels: linkedsoul: little-miss-stan: elegantmess100: blossombar...

9gag, Alive, and Apparently: I'm a therapist and keep this poster in my waiting room, apparently it's saved a few lives I DON'T LIKE THE PHRASE "A CRY FOR HELP" I JUST DON'T LIKE HOW IT SOUNDS. WHEN SOMEBODY SAYS TO ME. "IM THINKING ABOUT SUICIDE, I HAVE A PLAN: I JUST NEED A REASON NOT TO DO IT THE LAST THING I SEE IS HELPLESSNESS. I THINK: YOUR DEPRESSION HAS BEEN BEATING YOU UP FOR YEARS IT'S CALLED YOu UGLY, AND STUPID, AND PATHETIC, AND A FAILURE FOR SO LONG THAT YOU'VE FORGOTTEN THAT IT'S WRONG. YoU DON'T SEE ANY GOOD IN YOURSELF, AND YOU DON'T HAVE ANY HOPE BUT STILL, HERE YOU ARE: YOU'VE COME OVER TO ME, BANGED ON MY DOOR, AND SAID, "HEY! STAYING ALIVE IS REALLY HARD RIGHT NOW JUST GIVE ME SOMETHING TO FIGHT WITH! I DON'T CARE IF IT'S A STICK! GIVE ME A STICK ANDI CAN STAY ALIVE! HOW IS THAT HELPLESS? I THINK THAT'S INCREDIBLE. YOU'RE LIKE A MARINE: TRAPPED FOR YEARS BEHIND ENEMY LINES, YOUR GUN HAS BEEN TAKEN AWAY, YOU'RE OUT OF AMMO, YOU'RE MALNOURISHED, AND YOU'VE PROBABLY CALUGHT SOME KIND OF JUNGLE VIRUS THAT'S MAKING YoU HALLUCINATE GIANT SPIDERS AND YOU'RE STILL JUST GOING, "GIVE ME A STICK I'M NOT DYING OUT HERE "A CRY FOR HELP" MAKES IT SOUND LIKE IM SUPPOSED TO TAKE PITY ON YOu, BUT YOU DON'T NEED MY PITY THIS ISN'T PATHETIC. THIS IS THE WILL TO SURVIVE. THIS IS HOW HUMANS LIVED LONG ENOLIGH TO BECOME THE DOMINANT SPECIES WITH NO HOPE, RUNNING ON NOTHING, YOU'RE READY TO CUT THROUGH A HUNDRED MILES OF HOSTILE JUuNGLE WITH NOTHING BLIT A STICK, IF THAT'S WHAT IT TAKES TO GET TO SAFETY ALL IM DOING IS HANDING OUT STICKS YOU'RE THE ONE STAYING ALIVE VIA 9GAG.COM
9gag, Alive, and Apparently: I'm a therapist and keep this poster
 in my waiting room, apparently it's
 saved a few lives
 I DON'T LIKE THE PHRASE "A CRY FOR HELP" I JUST DON'T LIKE
 HOW IT SOUNDS. WHEN SOMEBODY SAYS TO ME. "IM THINKING
 ABOUT SUICIDE, I HAVE A PLAN: I JUST NEED A REASON NOT TO
 DO IT THE LAST THING I SEE IS HELPLESSNESS.
 I THINK: YOUR DEPRESSION HAS BEEN BEATING YOU UP FOR YEARS
 IT'S CALLED YOu UGLY, AND STUPID, AND PATHETIC, AND A FAILURE
 FOR SO LONG THAT YOU'VE FORGOTTEN THAT IT'S WRONG. YoU DON'T
 SEE ANY GOOD IN YOURSELF, AND YOU DON'T HAVE ANY HOPE
 BUT STILL, HERE YOU ARE: YOU'VE COME OVER TO ME, BANGED ON MY
 DOOR, AND SAID, "HEY! STAYING ALIVE IS REALLY HARD RIGHT NOW
 JUST GIVE ME SOMETHING TO FIGHT WITH! I DON'T CARE IF IT'S
 A STICK! GIVE ME A STICK ANDI CAN STAY ALIVE!
 HOW IS THAT HELPLESS? I THINK THAT'S INCREDIBLE. YOU'RE LIKE
 A MARINE: TRAPPED FOR YEARS BEHIND ENEMY LINES, YOUR GUN
 HAS BEEN TAKEN AWAY, YOU'RE OUT OF AMMO, YOU'RE
 MALNOURISHED, AND YOU'VE PROBABLY CALUGHT SOME KIND OF
 JUNGLE VIRUS THAT'S MAKING YoU HALLUCINATE GIANT SPIDERS
 AND YOU'RE STILL JUST GOING, "GIVE ME A STICK
 I'M NOT DYING OUT HERE
 "A CRY FOR HELP" MAKES IT SOUND LIKE IM SUPPOSED TO
 TAKE PITY ON YOu, BUT YOU DON'T NEED MY PITY THIS ISN'T
 PATHETIC. THIS IS THE WILL TO SURVIVE. THIS IS HOW HUMANS
 LIVED LONG ENOLIGH TO BECOME THE DOMINANT SPECIES
 WITH NO HOPE, RUNNING ON NOTHING, YOU'RE READY TO CUT
 THROUGH A HUNDRED MILES OF HOSTILE JUuNGLE WITH NOTHING
 BLIT A STICK, IF THAT'S WHAT IT TAKES TO GET TO SAFETY
 ALL IM DOING IS HANDING OUT STICKS
 YOU'RE THE ONE STAYING ALIVE
 VIA 9GAG.COM
Camera, Sleeping, and Man: A man said he couldn’t breathe when sleeping so he installed a camera to see why
Camera, Sleeping, and Man: A man said he couldn’t breathe when sleeping so he installed a camera to see why

A man said he couldn’t breathe when sleeping so he installed a camera to see why

Bad, Confused, and Family: bloodytales Teach boys about periods My mother also talked about periods to my brothers. When I first got mine I had terrible cramps. Crippling cramps. I once was camping with my family and a few of my big brother's friends when my period came. My cramps were so bad that my mom gave me a full pain killer (1 was 13 and before that she only gave me pills cut in half) T iterally laid down on my parents' air mattress and cried in pain for an hour before the pill kicked in. My brothers friend came in to the big tent and I was just curled up and sobbing. Now, I was quite the tomboy and was known to rough house with my brothers and their friends and made sure I wasnt seen as just "a little girl." So my brother's friend was confused to see me openly weeping in the fetal position (seriously, these were the worst cramps I have had in my life. My vision went white). He asked what was wrong with me. My big brother stood up immediately and suggested a nice long hike. During this hike I am sure he had a pretty awkward conversation with his friend explaining menstrual cramps, because when they got back the pain pill had (mostly) kicked in and I was sitting up at a table when my brother's friend sheepishly asked me if I was feeling better. I said I was better, and he said good. When we made s'mores that night my brother and his friend kept me well supplied with chocolate. Making sure sons know as much about periods and menstruation as daughters makes them better brothers, better sons better fathers, and better men. A man that understands a period will not lightly accuse a woman of "being on her period" if the woman is in an argument. Raise better sons Teach them about normal bodily functions Teach boys about periods via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2Z0YocM
Bad, Confused, and Family: bloodytales
 Teach boys about periods
 My mother also talked about periods to my brothers.
 When I first got mine I had terrible cramps. Crippling cramps. I once
 was camping with my family and a few of my big brother's friends
 when my period came. My cramps were so bad that my mom gave
 me a full pain killer (1 was 13 and before that she only gave me pills
 cut in half)
 T iterally laid down on my parents' air mattress and cried in pain for
 an hour before the pill kicked in.
 My brothers friend came in to the big tent and I was just curled up
 and sobbing. Now, I was quite the tomboy and was known to rough
 house with my brothers and their friends and made sure I wasnt seen
 as just "a little girl." So my brother's friend was confused to see me
 openly weeping in the fetal position (seriously, these were the worst
 cramps I have had in my life. My vision went white). He asked what
 was wrong with me.
 My big brother stood up immediately and suggested a nice long hike.
 During this hike I am sure he had a pretty awkward conversation with
 his friend explaining menstrual cramps, because when they got back
 the pain pill had (mostly) kicked in and I was sitting up at a table
 when my brother's friend sheepishly asked me if I was feeling better. I
 said I was better, and he said good.
 When we made s'mores that night my brother and his friend kept me
 well supplied with chocolate.
 Making sure sons know as much about periods and menstruation as
 daughters makes them better brothers, better sons better fathers,
 and better men. A man that understands a period will not lightly
 accuse a woman of "being on her period" if the woman is in an
 argument.
 Raise better sons Teach them about normal
 bodily functions
Teach boys about periods via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2Z0YocM

Teach boys about periods via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2Z0YocM

Being Alone, Beard, and Braids: Dwarven Hair Customs Much Like Orcs and Elves, Dwarves have many rules and customs in regards to their hair. Unlike Elves, who believe the act of cutting their hair is shameful, or Orcs who only maintain their hair until battle (an orcish answer to throwing down the gauntlet), a Dwarf will cut or restyle their hair at certain turning points during their life, such as reaching adulthood, marriage, a major victory loss (but not limited to) or on the battlefield, and death. Youth (50 and below) Simple, Free Ribbons -Beard hasn't come in fully No beads -No braids Usually or in a ponytail are popular with the kids worn loose Adulthood (51-200) (loose) Braids allowed Hair is very long if unmarried Beads can be earned -Improper entírely loose at this point ín life to wear hair AURUstETFe Old Age (200+ -Worn up, if long enough if short, ribbons, horsehair, wool, will be used to emulate longer hair etc Important note: the hair of a dwarf can be cut, but the beard gets left alone. Every dwarf grows a beard. If a dwarfling's beard hasnt come in by the time theyre 51, they remain a dwarfling until they grow one <Marriage Anewly married dwarf will cut off their hair in the back to signify commitment. Couples are disallowed from dívorce until both parties have regrown their hair to their shoulders (usually about 2 months). A married dwarf will cap their braids. 00 Victory This celebratory haircstyle is characterised by excessive decoration and braids, to be worn for 2 weeks, upon which the dwarf will add another bead to their everyday attire. < Battlefield Loss/Death of Loved One a Signified by an entirely clipped head of hair, when'a major loss is suffered in life, it's unlucky giving up some of your pride. not to pay it due respect by Death and Burial> A dwarf passingov must have their hair covered so that no beasts or demons see their life experiences. They to be allowed before the gods over into the afterlife on the journey may are said to uncover themselves AubuSE2fe filibusterfrog:dwarven hair customs
Being Alone, Beard, and Braids: Dwarven Hair Customs
 Much Like Orcs and Elves, Dwarves have
 many rules and customs in regards to their
 hair.
 Unlike Elves, who believe the act of cutting
 their hair is shameful, or Orcs who only maintain
 their hair until battle (an orcish answer to
 throwing down the gauntlet), a Dwarf will cut
 or restyle their hair at certain turning points
 during their life, such as
 reaching adulthood, marriage, a major victory
 loss
 (but not limited to)
 or
 on the battlefield, and death.
 Youth (50 and below)
 Simple, Free
 Ribbons
 -Beard hasn't come in
 fully
 No beads
 -No braids
 Usually
 or in a ponytail
 are
 popular
 with the
 kids
 worn loose
 Adulthood (51-200)
 (loose)
 Braids allowed
 Hair is very long
 if unmarried
 Beads can be earned
 -Improper
 entírely loose at this
 point ín life
 to wear hair
 AURUstETFe

 Old Age (200+
 -Worn up, if long
 enough
 if short, ribbons,
 horsehair, wool,
 will be used to
 emulate longer hair
 etc
 Important note: the hair of a dwarf can be cut, but the beard gets left alone.
 Every dwarf grows a beard. If a dwarfling's beard hasnt come in by the time
 theyre 51, they remain a dwarfling until they grow one
 <Marriage
 Anewly married dwarf will cut
 off their hair in the back to signify
 commitment. Couples are
 disallowed from dívorce until both
 parties have regrown their hair to
 their shoulders (usually about 2
 months). A married dwarf will cap
 their braids.
 00
 Victory
 This celebratory haircstyle is
 characterised by excessive decoration
 and braids, to be worn for 2 weeks,
 upon which the dwarf will add another
 bead to their everyday attire.
 < Battlefield Loss/Death of
 Loved One
 a
 Signified by an entirely clipped head of
 hair, when'a major loss is suffered in life,
 it's unlucky
 giving up some of your pride.
 not to pay it due respect by
 Death and Burial>
 A dwarf passingov
 must have their hair covered so that
 no beasts or demons
 see their life experiences. They
 to be allowed
 before the gods
 over into the afterlife
 on the journey may
 are said
 to uncover themselves
 AubuSE2fe
filibusterfrog:dwarven hair customs

filibusterfrog:dwarven hair customs

Drinking, Drunk, and Food: Jennifer Dziura I've responded to this elsewhere around the Internet. Men who offer to buy women drinks are often intending to purchase a lowering of the woman's defenses. If you are a woman in a bar and a man offers to buy you a this: cheerfully ask for something nonalcoholic, while indicating get to know the guy. At least 50% of men will be angry. They weren't offering a gift or just trying to strike up conversation: they wanted you to be drunk and to let down your guard. In my own experience, I have twice been offered a drink and instead suggested food -- in both cases, very inexpensive food costing the same or less than a drink drink, try willingness to a and in both -- cases, the man responded angrily. 2 minutes ago Like Reply Jennifer Dziura In one case, I met a guy at a concert.I liked him. He suggested going to get a drink, but I was starving and suggested the kebab place around the corner. I can't remember who paid, but I had a cheap bowl of soup and the guy pouted and I never saw him again. The other time, I had done standup in a bar and an older guy offered to buy me a drink. I said I actually would love some popcorn, which was sold **at the bar for $2.** The man got angry and acted like I had cheated him somehow. being greek-god-of-hair: erwin-with-hairpins: rainfelt: cardozzza: notyourexrotic: (source) Whoa, I didn’t realize that it was so deliberate, I honestly thought it was unconscious Scary, scary. Gonna add on to this:From the other side of the bar, I see this crap all the time. Seriously. I work at a high-density bar, and let me tell you, I have anywhere from 10-20 guys every night come up and tell me to, “serve her a stronger drink, I’m trying to get lucky tonight, know what I mean?” usually accompanied with a wink and a gesture at a girl who, in my experience, is going to go from mildly buzzed to definitively hammered if I keep serving her. Now, I like to think I’m a responsible bartender, so I usually tell guys like that to piss off, and, if I can, try to tell the girl’s more sober friends that they need to keep an eye on her. But everyone- just so you know, most of the time, when someone you don’t know is buying you a drink, they’re NOT doing it out of a sense of cordiality, they’re buying you a drink for the sole purpose of making you let your guard down. So: Tips for getting drinks- 1. ALWAYS GO TO THE BAR TO GET YOUR OWN DRINK, DO NOT LET STRANGERS CARRY YOUR DRINKS. This is an opportune time for dropping something into your cocktail, and you’re none the wiser. 2.IF YOU ORDER SOMETHING NON-ALCOHOLIC, I promise you, the bartender doesn’t give two shits that you’re not drinking cocktails with your friends, and often, totally understands that you don’t want to let your guard down around strangers. Usually, you can just tell the bartender that you’d like something light, and that’s a big clue to us that you’re uncomfortable with whomever you’re standing next to. Again, we see this all the time. 3. If you’re in a position to where you feel uncomfortable not ordering alcohol: Here’s a list of light liquors, and mixers that won’t get you drunk, and will still look like an actual cocktail: X-rated + sprite = easy to drink, sweet, and 12% alcoholic content. Not strong at all, usually runs $6-$8, depending on your state. Amaretto + sour= sweet, not strong, 26%. Peach Schnapps+ ginger ale= tastes like mellow butterscotch, 24%. Melon liquor (Midori, in most bars) + soda water = not overly sweet, 21% Coffee liquor (Kahlua) +soda = not super sweet, 20%. Hope this helps someone out! Backing this up from years of bar tending.
Drinking, Drunk, and Food: Jennifer Dziura
 I've responded to this elsewhere around the
 Internet. Men who offer to buy women drinks
 are often intending to purchase a lowering of
 the woman's defenses. If you are a woman in
 a bar and a man offers to buy you a
 this: cheerfully ask for something
 nonalcoholic, while indicating
 get to know the guy. At least 50% of men will
 be angry. They weren't offering a gift or just
 trying to strike up conversation: they wanted
 you to be drunk and to let down your guard. In
 my own experience, I have twice been offered
 a drink and instead suggested food -- in both
 cases, very inexpensive food costing the
 same or less than a drink
 drink, try
 willingness to
 a
 and in both
 --
 cases, the man responded angrily.
 2 minutes ago Like Reply
 Jennifer Dziura
 In one case, I met a guy at a concert.I liked
 him. He suggested going to get a drink, but I
 was starving and suggested the kebab place
 around the corner. I can't remember who paid,
 but I had a cheap bowl of soup and the guy
 pouted and I never saw him again. The other
 time, I had done standup in a bar and an older
 guy offered to buy me a drink. I said I actually
 would love some popcorn, which was
 sold **at the bar for $2.** The man got angry
 and acted like I had cheated him somehow.
 being
greek-god-of-hair:


erwin-with-hairpins:

rainfelt:

cardozzza:

notyourexrotic:

(source)

Whoa, I didn’t realize that it was so deliberate, I honestly thought it was unconscious

Scary, scary.


Gonna add on to this:From the other side of the bar, I see this crap all the time. Seriously. I work at a high-density bar, and let me tell you, I have anywhere from 10-20 guys every night come up and tell me to, “serve her a stronger drink, I’m trying to get lucky tonight, know what I mean?” usually accompanied with a wink and a gesture at a girl who, in my experience, is going to go from mildly buzzed to definitively hammered if I keep serving her. Now, I like to think I’m a responsible bartender, so I usually tell guys like that to piss off, and, if I can, try to tell the girl’s more sober friends that they need to keep an eye on her. But everyone- just so you know, most of the time, when someone you don’t know is buying you a drink, they’re NOT doing it out of a sense of cordiality, they’re buying you a drink for the sole purpose of making you let your guard down. So:
Tips for getting drinks-
1. ALWAYS GO TO THE BAR TO GET YOUR OWN DRINK, DO NOT LET STRANGERS CARRY YOUR DRINKS. This is an opportune time for dropping something into your cocktail, and you’re none the wiser. 
2.IF YOU ORDER SOMETHING NON-ALCOHOLIC, I promise you, the bartender doesn’t give two shits that you’re not drinking cocktails with your friends, and often, totally understands that you don’t want to let your guard down around strangers. Usually, you can just tell the bartender that you’d like something light, and that’s a big clue to us that you’re uncomfortable with whomever you’re standing next to. Again, we see this all the time.
3. If you’re in a position to where you feel uncomfortable not ordering alcohol:
Here’s a list of light liquors, and mixers that won’t get you drunk, and will still look like an actual cocktail:
X-rated + sprite = easy to drink, sweet, and 12% alcoholic content. Not strong at all, usually runs $6-$8, depending on your state.
Amaretto + sour= sweet, not strong, 26%.
Peach Schnapps+ ginger ale= tastes like mellow butterscotch, 24%.
Melon liquor (Midori, in most bars) + soda water = not overly sweet, 21%
Coffee liquor (Kahlua) +soda = not super sweet, 20%.
Hope this helps someone out!


Backing this up from years of bar tending.

greek-god-of-hair: erwin-with-hairpins: rainfelt: cardozzza: notyourexrotic: (source) Whoa, I didn’t realize that it was so deliberat...

Head, Hungry, and Lazy: The "I'm Not Angry" Mark Usage: When you need to be brief, but you're not angry Example We need to talk The Sinceriod Usage When you want to break out of your cycnical shell and be truly honest with someone. Example: Oh, wow, Thank you, This sweater is just what I wanted Sarcastises Usage The opposite of the sinceriod. Use when you want to be sarcastic, but in a way that's totally different and better from whatever system you're using now. Example: Oh, wow. Thank you. This sweater is just what I wanted. Hemi-Demi-Semi Colon Usage: If you don't know when it's appropriate to use a semi-colon, and you're too lazy to learn, you can use this in place of commas, semi-colons, and periods. Pretty much wherever you feel like it Eхample: Now I can act superior and avoid learning anything I'm a stain on humanity Andorpersand Usage: One simple symbol for "and/or" Example: Some people hate the very existence of the phrase "and/or, " but these people are uptight &o stupid Mockwotation Marks Usage: For quoting something that someone didn't say, but totally would say with the way they're being right now. The written equivalent of doing an impression of someone by saying "Look at me, I'm so-and-so" and wiggling your hands by your head, and speaking in a high-pitched voice. I'm Stacey. I'm going to complain about being hungry but not offer any suggestions of my own, said Stacey. Collegelf Superellipsis Usage: For an extreme dramatic pause. When you want the reader to wait a good 20 seconds before reading the next part of the sentence. Maybe even imagine the lights flickering and some thunder crashing. Example: He paused, cautiously, as he approached the superellipsis. On the other side he found... more words! Collegelm Morgan Freemark Usage: Reminds readers that they can read words in any voice they want, so maybe they should read these words in Morgan Freeman's voice. Example: And so, Kevin took this big swig of vodka and straight-up ran head-first into the wall you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com lolzandtrollz: New And Necessary Punctuation Marks
Head, Hungry, and Lazy: The "I'm Not Angry" Mark
 Usage:
 When you need to be brief,
 but you're not angry
 Example
 We need to talk
 The Sinceriod
 Usage
 When you want to break out of your
 cycnical shell and be truly honest
 with someone.
 Example:
 Oh, wow, Thank you, This sweater
 is just what I wanted
 Sarcastises
 Usage
 The opposite of the sinceriod. Use when
 you want to be sarcastic, but in a way
 that's totally different and better from
 whatever system you're using now.
 Example:
 Oh, wow. Thank you. This sweater is
 just what I wanted.
 Hemi-Demi-Semi Colon
 Usage:
 If you don't know when it's appropriate to use a
 semi-colon, and you're too lazy to learn, you can use
 this in place of commas, semi-colons, and periods.
 Pretty much wherever you feel like it
 Eхample:
 Now I can act superior and avoid learning anything
 I'm a stain on humanity
 Andorpersand
 Usage:
 One simple symbol for "and/or"
 Example:
 Some people hate the very
 existence of the phrase "and/or, "
 but these people are uptight &o
 stupid
 Mockwotation Marks
 Usage:
 For quoting something that someone
 didn't say, but totally would say with the
 way they're being right now. The written
 equivalent of doing an impression of
 someone by saying "Look at me, I'm
 so-and-so" and wiggling your hands by
 your head, and speaking in a high-pitched
 voice.
 I'm Stacey. I'm going to complain about
 being hungry but not offer any suggestions
 of my own, said Stacey.
 Collegelf
 Superellipsis
 Usage:
 For an extreme dramatic pause. When you want the reader to
 wait a good 20 seconds before reading the next part of the
 sentence. Maybe even imagine the lights flickering and some
 thunder crashing.
 Example:
 He paused, cautiously, as he approached the superellipsis. On
 the other side he found... more words!
 Collegelm
 Morgan Freemark
 Usage:
 Reminds readers that they can read words in
 any voice they want, so maybe they should
 read these words in Morgan Freeman's voice.
 Example:
 And so, Kevin took this big swig of vodka
 and straight-up ran head-first into the wall
 you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com
lolzandtrollz:

New And Necessary Punctuation Marks

lolzandtrollz: New And Necessary Punctuation Marks

Anime, Cartoon Network, and Love: COhen lwas a Kid hada big Spongebob plushie that Jeasth laved to was obsessed with Spongebob... Spongebob tooth brush paste! Ceadouod Pis! Sponge bob Bday Party! 0ριροφ ρυν could However, whe never AME-AVEmy undying CAPTAIN! love fo Sponge bob YoU READY KIDSP was not shared with my Mother... Ias ked her to comment and she stated: tgrates my 5ου His tormenting laugh haunts my dreams to this day "One day I came home from School and my s ponge bob plosh was missing from my bed./ \SPO0ONGEBOB! Searched everywhere but he was nowhere to be found... never Saw him ALWE! again... Years later,mother asked me to bring down my pillow covers So she could wash them ZI||I Spongebob wasn't misst na... He was murdered She amputate his limbs and nose and turned him into a pillow. Ga Istill cant believe yoo di that. lwas overcome with rage someoneintheshadow456: dysphoric-varian: dysphoric-rohan: dasha-henshins: outofpocket-prince: dysphoric-rohan: such-justice-wow: roselph: a murder mystery Uhhh that’s super fucked up if true. Imagine destroying your child’s toys and brushing it off I mean this is genuinely abusive. You can laugh it off now, but your parent destroyed your beloved possession just because your interests didn’t match theirs and they couldn’t manage their emotions. That’s a horrible way to treat your child. Ya that is fucked up :) but seriously you guys have some weird impressions of what parents are. They are dumbass adults who grew biological polyps. They are allowed to have feelings. Yeah turning SpongeBob into a Dexter pillow is not a stellar response to grateing nautical laughter, but it didn’t hurt anyone, and they can laugh about it now, what secret psychological dagger do you think was rammed into their heart? Abuse is more then being petty, it is more than being mean. Emotional parental abuse fucks you over about as much as physical one, but we just don’t talk about it. Don’t excuse abuse with “they’re just human and have feelings”. I have feelings, too, but do I break things belonging to my loved ones? Do I rip off the arms and legs of my fiancee’s or my brothers’ action figures and plushes? No! Because I love those people and treat their things with respect. It 100% does hurt people. Can you not imagine the pain of being a child and having your favourite stuffed toy go missing? Can you imagine the trauma of seeing your favourite stuffed toy mutilated when you’re just a child?Not respecting somebody’s belongings or going out of your way to destroy or get rid of somebody’s belongings is abuse. I know this because I was abused and this was done to me as part of my abuser’s control over me.Yes, abuse is more than being mean. Glad you mentioned that. Abuse is being mean, to somebody you’re supposed to love and care for, and who trusts you deeply. You’ve proved my point. Tearing up your kids toy is the same as destroying your fiances xbox. My mom practically grounded me every time I watched Cartoon Network because she thought it was annoying. My parents used to bully me for liking anime and even told me that the only way to get people to like me is to abandon it and become “normal, instead of watching stupid trash.” When I mentioned my classmates making fun of me they said “of course they will if you continue to watch garbage.” Worst part was that the lesson I ACTUALLY needed to learn was “be considerate about others, not everyone likes the same thing as you, there’s a time and place to talk about your interests.” But they didn’t know how to teach that to me and thought if they verbally abused me I’d somehow get the message from that.
Anime, Cartoon Network, and Love: COhen lwas a Kid hada
 big Spongebob plushie that
 Jeasth
 laved to
 was obsessed with
 Spongebob...
 Spongebob
 tooth brush
 paste!
 Ceadouod
 Pis!
 Sponge bob
 Bday Party!
 0ριροφ ρυν
 could
 However,
 whe never
 AME-AVEmy undying
 CAPTAIN! love fo
 Sponge bob
 YoU READY
 KIDSP
 was not
 shared
 with my
 Mother...
 Ias ked her to comment
 and she stated:
 tgrates my
 5ου
 His tormenting
 laugh haunts my
 dreams to
 this day

 "One day I came home from
 School and my s ponge bob plosh
 was missing from my bed./
 \SPO0ONGEBOB!
 Searched
 everywhere but
 he was nowhere
 to be found...
 never
 Saw him
 ALWE!
 again...

 Years later,mother asked me to
 bring down my pillow covers
 So she could wash them
 ZI||I
 Spongebob wasn't
 misst na...
 He was
 murdered

 She amputate
 his limbs and
 nose
 and turned him into
 a pillow.
 Ga
 Istill cant
 believe yoo di
 that.
 lwas overcome
 with rage
someoneintheshadow456:

dysphoric-varian:

dysphoric-rohan:


dasha-henshins:

outofpocket-prince:


dysphoric-rohan:


such-justice-wow:

roselph:
a murder mystery

Uhhh that’s super fucked up if true. Imagine destroying your child’s toys and brushing it off

I mean this is genuinely abusive. You can laugh it off now, but your parent destroyed your beloved possession just because your interests didn’t match theirs and they couldn’t manage their emotions. That’s a horrible way to treat your child.


Ya that is fucked up :) but seriously you guys have some weird impressions of what parents are. They are dumbass adults who grew biological polyps. They are allowed to have feelings. Yeah turning SpongeBob into a Dexter pillow is not a stellar response to grateing nautical laughter, but it didn’t hurt anyone, and they can laugh about it now, what secret psychological dagger do you think was rammed into their heart? Abuse is more then being petty, it is more than being mean. 


Emotional parental abuse fucks you over about as much as physical one, but we just don’t talk about it. 

Don’t excuse abuse with “they’re just human and have feelings”. I have feelings, too, but do I break things belonging to my loved ones? Do I rip off the arms and legs of my fiancee’s or my brothers’ action figures and plushes? No! Because I love those people and treat their things with respect. It 100% does hurt people. Can you not imagine the pain of being a child and having your favourite stuffed toy go missing? Can you imagine the trauma of seeing your favourite stuffed toy mutilated when you’re just a child?Not respecting somebody’s belongings or going out of your way to destroy or get rid of somebody’s belongings is abuse. I know this because I was abused and this was done to me as part of my abuser’s control over me.Yes, abuse is more than being mean. Glad you mentioned that. Abuse is being mean, to somebody you’re supposed to love and care for, and who trusts you deeply. You’ve proved my point.


Tearing up your kids toy is the same as destroying your fiances xbox. 
My mom practically grounded me every time I watched Cartoon Network because she thought it was annoying. 


My parents used to bully me for liking anime and even told me that the only way to get people to like me is to abandon it and become “normal, instead of watching stupid trash.” When I mentioned my classmates making fun of me they said “of course they will if you continue to watch garbage.” 
Worst part was that the lesson I ACTUALLY needed to learn was “be considerate about others, not everyone likes the same thing as you, there’s a time and place to talk about your interests.” But they didn’t know how to teach that to me and thought if they verbally abused me I’d somehow get the message from that.

someoneintheshadow456: dysphoric-varian: dysphoric-rohan: dasha-henshins: outofpocket-prince: dysphoric-rohan: such-justice-wow: r...