Chris Simpsons
Chris Simpsons

Chris Simpsons

Amount
Amount

Amount

Rarest Pepes
Rarest Pepes

Rarest Pepes

Smalls
Smalls

Smalls

Ultra
Ultra

Ultra

Mofoe
Mofoe

Mofoe

Rareness
Rareness

Rareness

awkwardly
 awkwardly

awkwardly

no
 no

no

were
were

were

🔥 | Latest

Cats, Chicago, and Clock: The Independent @Independent Here's what you should do in the event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/ 2piOhjW 8/9/17, 3:19 PM NBC News @NBCNews NBC NEWS "Don't run. Get inside". What experts say to do in case of a nuclear attack nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt 8/9/17, 9:30 AM CN CNN @CNN Hawaii is preparing in case of a North Korea attack. Experts say you have about 15 min. to take cover after a launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9 taraljc: lemonsharks: nikkoliferous: biggest-goldiest-spoon: zoanzon: missmwynter: madlyinlov3onda: oakenroots: oakenroots: quietrain: shesheistyy: tripprophet: weavemama: ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the “in case a nuclear attack happens” phase……. [x] This shit is wild. Wtf a table finna do for anybody?? There’s basically nothing you can do but die they’re doing this to give people a sense of safety , even though we full well know this won’t work at all. ALRIGHT KIDDOS LISTEN UP! I did emergency management for the air force which involves this fun thing called Plume Modelling (aka chart the path of death for a given bomb based on its payload, distance, type of detonation, etc) and let me tell you some actual LEGIT™ methods of minimizing damage to your life. Unless you are within the vaporization zone (where you turn into a fucking shadow because of your proximity to the blast) there is a specific order of events nuke blasts cause and there are ways to protect against these things. 1. There is this thing called a flash to bang ratio. It is really freaking important. The first wave from a nuke is a blinding flash of light that can literally FRY YOUR RETINAS. If you believe that a nuke has just dropped on your city, HIDE AND DONT LOOK AT IT. @shesheistyy a good solid table is good for this but you’re way less likely to go blind if you get to an internal room with no windows, especially one below ground. 2. After the flash there will be the bang. If the time between the flash and the bang, counted in Mississippi seconds, is more than 10 seconds you MIGHT survive and just die of cancer later. If it’s between five and 10 buckle up kiddos because the worst is yet to come. And well if it’s less than 3 you won’t live long enough to remember this. These are loose estimates only. 3. The “bang” usually announces the arrival of the fire ball. Yes. A massive heat shock will erupt from the core of the bomb and light pretty much every thing it comes into contact with, including your flesh, on fire. Back to that whole “metal buildings underground” thing. There’s really no getting around the whole getting lit on fire if you’re too close thing. 4. Fallout. When the bomb goes off it sucks all of the shit it just vaporized up into the air with it and as the blast cools, it begins to rain down the radioactive fucked molten wreckage onto everyone in a huge radius. Just because the fallout you can see has stopped doesn’t mean the molecular radiation has stopped. The survival factors for nuclear blasts are time, distance and shielding. The longer it takes for it to get to you the less of it there is. The further away from the source the less dead you are. Want to survive? Put 6 feet of concrete and/or 2 feet of lead between you and everything else. Yes. Those loons with their bunkers actually got something right. NOW! About radiation! If you are so fortunate as to survive one of these blasts and not be vaporized or burnt to a crisp or die of radiation poisoning within hours, you need to understand the types of radiation. Gamma radiation is the most “severe” in that it can penetrate your flesh through your clothes and house, causing severe illness. Gamma radiation fucks with your cell walls and disrupts your DNA. It kills you in hours, months or years. Some people survive decades. Think of gamma like the sun. Too much exposure gives you cancer. Now Beta, on the other hand, think of Beta particles like sand on the beach. Its in the air. Its in your clothes, in the creases of your fingers. But beta particles can burn through your flesh or get into your blood stream through open wounds. Luckily they can be stopped with nonporous materials, like rubber, or foil. Make that two points for the loony conspiracy theorists. Aluminum foil does protect from beta radiation. And finally, Alpha radiation. Think of alpha Radiation like dust motes. It takes a high density filter to prevent you from breathing them in and if you’re surrounded by rubble they’re probably everywhere. Alpha particles do the same thing as beta particles in terms of getting into your system and wrecking your shit. So! Survival? Most likely based on dumb luck. But! If you think you’re being nuked 1. get under ground or at least to an internal room of the building if no other options are available. 2. CLOSE YOUR EYES. Curl into the fetal position to protect your orifices and vital organs from gamma radiation and get low to the ground to reduce damage from the blast and potential ceiling collapse. 3.You will still feel the flash pass over you. Count. One, two, three… If you aren’t vaporized yet keep counting. Pray to every god ever imagined that you get to 10 before you hear the bang. 4. Bang. Try not to shit yourself. The fireball will follow almost instantly if you’re in range. Be prepared to start rolling to put yourself out. 5. Fallout rains down. Do not open your eyes. Do not stop praying. As hard as it is because time will feel as if it has slowed to a crawl, try not to leave your position for at least 30 minutes, although 60 minutes is better. At 30 minutes, only 60% of the potential fall out has fallen but by 60 minutes, up to 90% may have come down. 6. Remember, Alpha and beta radiation are particles. Do not put anything in your body that has not been thoroughly washed, dusted of or came from a sealed package. Point 3 for the conspiracy theorists, hot pockets and canned food are probably still safe. Do not leave shelter without goggles, and try to wrap yourself in a minimum of those weird space blankets but rubber and metal lined suits (like hazmat suits) are best for the job. Good luck in the future apocalypse! Reblogged with improved readability! Look whats Relevant again… I wonder if there’s any where to watch White Light, Black Rain. Saw it back in highschool. History repeats and all that jazz. After all, It’s not like ‘duck and cover’ and other nuclear protection methods of dubious quality weren’t a mainstream in the Cold War or anything… We’ve been here before. It’s just the first time around for us younger crowd. Stay safe. Reminder that according to the Doomsday Clock, we are currently at greater threat of nuclear annihilation than we were even at the height of the Cold War. Nukemap for “how far from ground zero must I be to survive this” https://nuclearsecrecy.com/nukemap/ Like… Manhattan might be toast but that doesn’t mean the citizens of Long Island shouldn’t know how to mitigate their terrible fuckin situation just because Manhattan is toast. If downtown Chicago is at the center of a nuclear bombing when I’m at work I’m dead, but if I’m home I have a chance to shelter in place and then bag up the cats and go crash with friends in Wisconsin. And also how absofuckinglutely horrifying is it that we need to know this shit? very absofuckingluteky horrifying
Cats, Chicago, and Clock: The Independent
 @Independent
 Here's what you should do in the
 event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/
 2piOhjW
 8/9/17, 3:19 PM

 NBC News
 @NBCNews
 NBC NEWS
 "Don't run. Get inside". What experts
 say to do in case of a nuclear attack
 nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt
 8/9/17, 9:30 AM

 CN
 CNN
 @CNN
 Hawaii is preparing in case of a North
 Korea attack. Experts say you have
 about 15 min. to take cover after a
 launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9
taraljc:

lemonsharks:


nikkoliferous:

biggest-goldiest-spoon:

zoanzon:

missmwynter:

madlyinlov3onda:

oakenroots:

oakenroots:


quietrain:

shesheistyy:

tripprophet:


weavemama:

ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the “in case a nuclear attack happens” phase……. [x]

This shit is wild.


Wtf a table finna do for anybody?? There’s basically nothing you can do but die

they’re doing this to give people a sense of safety , even though we full well know this won’t work at all.

ALRIGHT KIDDOS LISTEN UP! I did emergency management for the air force which involves this fun thing called Plume Modelling (aka chart the path of death for a given bomb based on its payload, distance, type of detonation, etc) and let me tell you some actual LEGIT™ methods of minimizing damage to your life. 
Unless you are within the vaporization zone (where you turn into a fucking shadow because of your proximity to the blast) there is a specific order of events nuke blasts cause and there are ways to protect against these things.

1. There is this thing called a flash to bang ratio. It is really freaking important. The first wave from a nuke is a blinding flash of light that can literally FRY YOUR RETINAS. If you believe that a nuke has just dropped on your city, HIDE AND DONT LOOK AT IT. @shesheistyy a good solid table is good for this but you’re way less likely to go blind if you get to an internal room with no windows, especially one below ground. 
2. After the flash there will be the bang. If the time between the flash and the bang, counted in Mississippi seconds, is more than 10 seconds you MIGHT survive and just die of cancer later. If it’s between five and 10 buckle up kiddos because the worst is yet to come. And well if it’s less than 3 you won’t live long enough to remember this. These are loose estimates only. 
3. The “bang” usually announces the arrival of the fire ball. Yes. A massive heat shock will erupt from the core of the bomb and light pretty much every thing it comes into contact with, including your flesh, on fire. Back to that whole “metal buildings underground” thing. There’s really no getting around the whole getting lit on fire if you’re too close thing. 
4. Fallout. When the bomb goes off it sucks all of the shit it just vaporized up into the air with it and as the blast cools, it begins to rain down the radioactive fucked molten wreckage onto everyone in a huge radius. Just because the fallout you can see has stopped doesn’t mean the molecular radiation has stopped. 

The survival factors for nuclear blasts are time, distance and shielding. The longer it takes for it to get to you the less of it there is. The further away from the source the less dead you are. Want to survive? Put 6 feet of concrete and/or 2 feet of lead between you and everything else. Yes. Those loons with their bunkers actually got something right. 

NOW! About radiation! If you are so fortunate as to survive one of these blasts and not be vaporized or burnt to a crisp or die of radiation poisoning within hours, you need to understand the types of radiation. 

Gamma radiation is the most “severe” in that it can penetrate your flesh through your clothes and house, causing severe illness. Gamma radiation fucks with your cell walls and disrupts your DNA. It kills you in hours, months or years. Some people survive decades. Think of gamma like the sun. Too much exposure gives you cancer. 

Now Beta, on the other hand, think of Beta particles like sand on the beach. Its in the air. Its in your clothes, in the creases of your fingers. But beta particles can burn through your flesh or get into your blood stream through open wounds. Luckily they can be stopped with nonporous materials, like rubber, or foil. Make that two points for the loony conspiracy theorists. Aluminum foil does protect from beta radiation. 

And finally, Alpha radiation. Think of alpha Radiation like dust motes. It takes a high density filter to prevent you from breathing them in and if you’re surrounded by rubble they’re probably everywhere. Alpha particles do the same thing as beta particles in terms of getting into your system and wrecking your shit. 

So! Survival? Most likely based on dumb luck. But! If you think you’re being nuked
1. get under ground or at least to an internal room of the building if no other options are available. 
2. CLOSE YOUR EYES. Curl into the fetal position to protect your orifices and vital organs from gamma radiation and get low to the ground to reduce damage from the blast and potential ceiling collapse. 
3.You will still feel the flash pass over you. Count. One, two, three… If you aren’t vaporized yet keep counting. Pray to every god ever imagined that you get to 10 before you hear the bang. 
4. Bang. Try not to shit yourself. The fireball will follow almost instantly if you’re in range. Be prepared to start rolling to put yourself out. 
5. Fallout rains down. Do not open your eyes. Do not stop praying. As hard as it is because time will feel as if it has slowed to a crawl, try not to leave your position for at least 30 minutes, although 60 minutes is better. At 30 minutes, only 60% of the potential fall out has fallen but by 60 minutes, up to 90% may have come down. 
6. Remember, Alpha and beta radiation are particles. Do not put anything in your body that has not been thoroughly washed, dusted of or came from a sealed package. Point 3 for the conspiracy theorists, hot pockets and canned food are probably still safe. Do not leave shelter without goggles, and try to wrap yourself in a minimum of those weird space blankets but rubber and metal lined suits (like hazmat suits) are best for the job. 

Good luck in the future apocalypse!


Reblogged with improved readability!

Look whats Relevant again…


I wonder if there’s any where to watch White Light, Black Rain. Saw it back in highschool.

History repeats and all that jazz.
After all, It’s not like ‘duck and cover’ and other nuclear protection methods of dubious quality weren’t a mainstream in the Cold War or anything…
We’ve been here before.
It’s just the first time around for us younger crowd.


Stay safe. 

Reminder that according to the Doomsday Clock, we are currently at greater threat of nuclear annihilation than we were even at the height of the Cold War.


Nukemap for “how far from ground zero must I be to survive this”
https://nuclearsecrecy.com/nukemap/
Like… Manhattan might be toast but that doesn’t mean the citizens of Long Island shouldn’t know how to mitigate their terrible fuckin situation just because Manhattan is toast.
If downtown Chicago is at the center of a nuclear bombing when I’m at work I’m dead, but if I’m home I have a chance to shelter in place and then bag up the cats and go crash with friends in Wisconsin.
And also how absofuckinglutely horrifying is it that we need to know this shit?


very absofuckingluteky horrifying

taraljc: lemonsharks: nikkoliferous: biggest-goldiest-spoon: zoanzon: missmwynter: madlyinlov3onda: oakenroots: oakenroots: quiet...

Android, Birthday, and Christmas: Mevan ls @MeAndVan Hi internet, this is a longshot BUT I was a refugee for 5 yrs in the 90s and this man, who worked at a refugee camp near Zwolle in the Netherlands, out of the kindness of his own heart bought heart exploded with joy. I just want to know his name. Help? me a bike. My five year old 12 aug. 19 om 17:00 Twitter for Android Mevan las @MeAndVan WE FOUND HIM!! A thread After 3000 RTs, 3 news articles, 1 video and thousands of wonderful messages from around the world, @Arjen78 made contact with the family! Guys, I knew the internet was great but this is something else. Mevan | l@MeAndVan 22m Not only did I find him, but I've also had other refugees reach out to me and tell me that him and his wife helped them too! Their kindness has touched so many lives. One woman said "they weren't friends to me, they were family" Mevan | la @MeAndVan 22m AND someone else who worked at the camp got in touch, Sandra, she was incredible too, she helped me use a computer for the first time! I now work in tech! More so than anything I remember these small kindnesses growing up, they helped shape me. Mevan | ls@MeAndVan 14u For those wondering here what five year old Mevan looked like. This was my fifth birthday in the refugee camp in Zwolle She doesn't even know that an incredible bike is coming her way aaaany day now! Deze collectie weergeven 33 1 Mevan l@MeAndVan 23m Later today, 24 years later, I get to meet him in person! Thank you to everyone who made that possible, to every single person who RT'd and to those who sent messages. Special thanks to @Janske1 @Arjen78 @ds Zwolle. I will update this thread with how it goes! WISH ME LUCK! 17 101 t6 Within a day, she found the man who gave her a bike for Christmas almost 25 years ago
Android, Birthday, and Christmas: Mevan ls
 @MeAndVan
 Hi internet, this is a longshot BUT I
 was a refugee for 5 yrs in the 90s and
 this man, who worked at a refugee
 camp near Zwolle in the Netherlands,
 out of the kindness of his own heart
 bought
 heart exploded with joy. I just want to
 know his name. Help?
 me a bike. My five year old
 12 aug. 19 om 17:00 Twitter for Android
 Mevan las
 @MeAndVan
 WE FOUND HIM!! A thread
 After 3000 RTs, 3 news articles, 1
 video and thousands of wonderful
 messages from around the world,
 @Arjen78 made contact with the
 family!
 Guys, I knew the internet was great
 but this is something else.
 Mevan | l@MeAndVan 22m
 Not only did I find him, but I've also had other
 refugees reach out to me and tell me that him
 and his wife helped them too! Their kindness
 has touched so many lives. One woman said
 "they weren't friends to me, they were family"
 Mevan | la @MeAndVan 22m
 AND someone else who worked at the camp
 got in touch, Sandra, she was incredible too,
 she helped me use a computer for the first
 time! I now work in tech!
 More so than anything I remember these
 small kindnesses growing up, they helped
 shape me.
 Mevan | ls@MeAndVan 14u
 For those wondering here what five year
 old Mevan looked like. This was my fifth
 birthday in the refugee camp in Zwolle
 She doesn't even know that an incredible
 bike is coming her way aaaany day now!
 Deze collectie weergeven
 33
 1
 Mevan l@MeAndVan 23m
 Later today, 24 years later, I get to meet him
 in person!
 Thank you to everyone who made that
 possible, to every single person who RT'd and
 to those who sent messages. Special thanks
 to @Janske1 @Arjen78 @ds Zwolle.
 I will update this thread with how it goes!
 WISH ME LUCK!
 17
 101
 t6
Within a day, she found the man who gave her a bike for Christmas almost 25 years ago

Within a day, she found the man who gave her a bike for Christmas almost 25 years ago

Beard, Church, and Community: Generalissimo Justice is flying to SDCC @QueenAnitaCox Imagine the neckbeard INCELS in a basement in Kentuckey creating this Everglade Angels comic: "Remember the 90S Blake?! Tits were bigger then, draw them bigger!" Educated people will not buy this garbage Good luck selling this, Trump Bros! Idiot customers await! CADE ELS Thread Blake Northcott @BlakeNorthcott Thank you for your assessment of my new graphic novel. Perhaps I can help you with some fact checking, though. We are not 'Trump bros'. Neither myself nor my cover artist have ever voted in an American election. I'm Canadian, and the artist is Italian. /1 Generalissimo Justice is flying to SDCC @QueenAnitaCox Imagine the neckbeard INCELS in a basement in Kentuckey creating this Everglade Angels comic: "Remember the 90S Blake?! Tits were bigger then, draw them bigger!" Educated people will not buy this garbage Good luck selling this, Trump Bros! Idiot customers await! Thread Blake Northcott @BlakeNorthcott Neither of us live in subterranean dwellings, and to the best of my knowledge, neither of us have ever grown a beard - neck or otherwise. I've tried to grow one several times. The results have been rather disappointing. /2 8:27 pm 20 Jul 2019 Twitter Web App i View Tweet activity Blake Northcott @BlakeNorthcott And since my name is Blake, it's sometimes confusing to new readers - I'm not a 'dude' or a 'bro' I'm the one on the left. And my cover artist, Leila Leiz, is on the right. As you can see: both beardless. And both above ground! /3 8:27 pm 20 Jul 2019 Twitter Web App Blake Northcott @BlakeNorthcott Appreciate the Retweet of the cover art, though. You left out the URL EvergladeAngels.com Tell your 4 followers to check it out Love and hugs, Blake PS: It's spelled 'Kentucky'. You're an educated person, you should know that. PPS: The 90s and tits are both rad. /4 SEROM THE CREATOR OF HAPPYDEATH DAY, THEAUTHOR OF THE'NORTH VALLEY GRIMOIRE& THE ARTIST FROM RAT QUEENS CADE ELS celticpyro: peliaosfiendline: celticpyro: derpomatic: friendly-neighborhood-patriarch: catherine-siena-dr-of-the-church: friendly-neighborhood-patriarch: why do these people hate big tits and pretty women all of a sudden I’m a 46DD - I like me some representation!  The naturally big-titted community needs love, too! its kinda disheartening and surprising how often I hear that kinda stuff from you ladies The Stevens Universes are at it again.worst fandom on the net, but also “progressive” so it’s ignored by the same media that goes after bronies. Can’t believe she handed this guy an L. Sadly, instead of Taking the L, this is what they’ve gone and done
Beard, Church, and Community: Generalissimo Justice is flying to SDCC
 @QueenAnitaCox
 Imagine the neckbeard INCELS in a basement in
 Kentuckey creating this Everglade Angels comic:
 "Remember the 90S Blake?! Tits were bigger then, draw
 them bigger!" Educated people will not buy this garbage
 Good luck selling this, Trump Bros! Idiot customers
 await!
 CADE
 ELS

 Thread
 Blake Northcott
 @BlakeNorthcott
 Thank you for your assessment of my new graphic novel.
 Perhaps I can help you with some fact checking, though.
 We are not 'Trump bros'.
 Neither myself nor my cover artist have ever voted in an
 American election. I'm Canadian, and the artist is Italian.
 /1
 Generalissimo Justice is flying to SDCC
 @QueenAnitaCox
 Imagine the neckbeard INCELS in a basement in
 Kentuckey creating this Everglade Angels comic:
 "Remember the 90S Blake?! Tits were bigger then, draw
 them bigger!" Educated people will not buy this garbage
 Good luck selling this, Trump Bros! Idiot customers
 await!

 Thread
 Blake Northcott
 @BlakeNorthcott
 Neither of us live in subterranean dwellings, and to the
 best of my knowledge, neither of us have ever grown a
 beard - neck or otherwise.
 I've tried to grow one several times.
 The results have been rather disappointing. /2
 8:27 pm 20 Jul 2019 Twitter Web App
 i View Tweet activity

 Blake Northcott
 @BlakeNorthcott
 And since my name is Blake, it's sometimes confusing to
 new readers - I'm not a 'dude' or a 'bro'
 I'm the one on the left. And my cover artist, Leila Leiz, is
 on the right.
 As you can see: both beardless. And both above ground!
 /3
 8:27 pm 20 Jul 2019 Twitter Web App

 Blake Northcott
 @BlakeNorthcott
 Appreciate the Retweet of the cover art, though. You left
 out the URL EvergladeAngels.com
 Tell your 4 followers to check it out
 Love and hugs,
 Blake
 PS: It's spelled 'Kentucky'. You're an educated person,
 you should know that.
 PPS: The 90s and tits are both rad. /4
 SEROM THE CREATOR OF HAPPYDEATH DAY, THEAUTHOR OF
 THE'NORTH VALLEY GRIMOIRE& THE ARTIST FROM RAT QUEENS
 CADE
 ELS
celticpyro:

peliaosfiendline:
celticpyro:


derpomatic:

friendly-neighborhood-patriarch:

catherine-siena-dr-of-the-church:


friendly-neighborhood-patriarch:
why do these people hate big tits and pretty women all of a sudden 
I’m a 46DD - I like me some representation!  The naturally big-titted community needs love, too!


its kinda disheartening and surprising how often I hear that kinda stuff from you ladies

The Stevens Universes are at it again.worst fandom on the net, but also “progressive” so it’s ignored by the same media that goes after bronies.

Can’t believe she handed this guy an L.


Sadly, instead of Taking the L, this is what they’ve gone and done

celticpyro: peliaosfiendline: celticpyro: derpomatic: friendly-neighborhood-patriarch: catherine-siena-dr-of-the-church: friendly-nei...

Fucking, Funny, and Sherlock Holmes: IWONDER WHAT THE CODE IS. 3 5 4 # 4wincherlockedintardis even with those four numbers there are countless possible combinations good luck with figuring out which one is the right one you punk eatsleepcrap straightens calculator It's pretty likely that it's a four digit number, and as there are four digits chosen there, that means that there cannot be any repetition. This mean that there are: n!/(n-4)! possible orders. As 'n' is 4 (number of digits available). 41/0! which becomes 4x3x2x1/1 which simplifies to 24. That means that there are 24 possible combinations of codes. This would take you about two or three minutes to input all possible codes. syd224 Unless an alarm goes off if you don't get it right in 3 tries eatsleepcrap straightens calculator again Kick the fucking door in my-weeping-angel Deactivated well 'technically' the code is most likley 1970. statistically, a majority of people, when told to choose a 4 digit code will choose their birth year. and this key pad is obviously a few years old to put it nicely, thats most likley it everyonesfavoriteging some sherlock holmes shit just went down over here heroscafe BBC No, no, no. Don't base your deductions of psychology. Let's talk chemistry. When you first press a button, there's more of the natural oils on your skin, and therefore it wears down the numbers on the keys faster. Obviously 0 is the first one, then. Try 0791 first. Sherlock out. perks-of-being-chinese woah. trypophobic-canine it got better twistedthicket1 and this is why the sherlock fandom could either rule the world or end it.. badgerdash-cumberquat Those deductions are great and all, but unnecessary. The light is green. The door is already open. winchester-kelly And that's why we have a John Watson. STRANGEBEAVER.com C0 D 00 * 25 Sherlock Holmes Funny Quotes #Sherlock Holmes #Funny
Fucking, Funny, and Sherlock Holmes: IWONDER WHAT THE CODE IS.
 3
 5
 4
 #
 4wincherlockedintardis
 even with those four numbers there are countless possible combinations good
 luck with figuring out which one is the right one you punk
 eatsleepcrap
 straightens calculator
 It's pretty likely that it's a four digit number, and as there are four digits chosen
 there, that means that there cannot be any repetition. This mean that there are:
 n!/(n-4)! possible orders. As 'n' is 4 (number of digits available). 41/0! which
 becomes 4x3x2x1/1 which simplifies to 24. That means that there are 24
 possible combinations of codes. This would take you about two or three
 minutes to input all possible codes.
 syd224
 Unless an alarm goes off if you don't get it right in 3 tries
 eatsleepcrap
 straightens calculator again
 Kick the fucking door in
 my-weeping-angel Deactivated
 well 'technically' the code is most likley 1970. statistically, a majority of people,
 when told to choose a 4 digit code will choose their birth year. and this key pad
 is obviously a few years old to put it nicely, thats most likley it
 everyonesfavoriteging
 some sherlock holmes shit just went down over here
 heroscafe
 BBC
 No, no, no. Don't base your deductions of psychology. Let's talk chemistry.
 When you first press a button, there's more of the natural oils on your skin, and
 therefore it wears down the numbers on the keys faster. Obviously 0 is the first
 one, then. Try 0791 first.
 Sherlock out.
 perks-of-being-chinese
 woah.
 trypophobic-canine
 it got better
 twistedthicket1
 and this is why the sherlock fandom could either rule the world or end it..
 badgerdash-cumberquat
 Those deductions are great and all, but unnecessary.
 The light is green.
 The door is already open.
 winchester-kelly
 And that's why we have a John Watson.
 STRANGEBEAVER.com
 C0 D
 00
 *
25 Sherlock Holmes Funny Quotes #Sherlock Holmes #Funny

25 Sherlock Holmes Funny Quotes #Sherlock Holmes #Funny

Apparently, Ass, and Drunk: snarling-through-our-smiles I once lost my keys at a frat house. My drunk ass had actually walked home without them, pounded on my apartment door, gotten let in by my rightfully- disgruntled roommate, and proceeded to pass out on the couch. Apparently I puked in the toilet before passing out do not remember The next morning, I schlepped back to the frat house. I stood there, right in front of the front door. This was a novel experience for me. I'd never been at a frat house in broad daylight before. A boy, presumably, of the house, asked me what I was doing. "I lost my keys in here last night, I called back. "I was seeing if I could go in and look for them?" He opened the door and gestured for me o come in. "Go wherever you want." I'd never seen a frat house post-party Derore. Wandering up the stairs a by hungover and still-drunk frat boys sandals and gym shorts, seeking out food and showers like moths to a porch light. A few of them threw puzzled glances my way. I'm sure they thought I was some post-bacchanalia hallucination. I entered one room where a boy was drunkenly watching some Old Yeller- esque movie on a tiny TV in the corner of his room from his bed. "Do you like dog movies?" he asked, voice from the fact that his face was squished against his pillow and half-buried by his blanket. I told him I did. e mumbled again, pleased, and asked what I was doing. I told him I was looking my keys. "Sorry, I haven't seen any keys around bere I didn't doubt him. Twenty minutes had passed. I'd searched just about every bedroom and nuclear- at dumn-site of a bathroom in that house. I'd given up on ever finding my keys and was prepared to beg my roommates' forgiveness and get a new set copied. As I stood there in the hallway, silently a particularly burly frat boy approached me. "You need help with something? "I lost my keys here last night and I can't find them, I've looked everywhere. "What do they look like? I'll put it into the group chat. He was already pulling out his phone. No one ever checks a group chat, I thought, but what the hell. It was worth a shot. "Um, it's just a ring of keys. The keychain is a pink plastic cat, though, like yea big. Like bright pink, you can't miss He nodded, presumably typing this description faithfully into the group chat. "Alright, I sent the message out. Good luck. e turned and left. And with that, A few moments later, I heard a distant and it was getting louder and louder, One assumes that how I felt in that moment was how Simba felt seeing the wildebeest stampede through the ravine as a horde large young men all thundered down the stairs, making a beeling for me. "Someone tell the girl!" One of them shouted, faceless in the mob. "Girl! Hey, GIRL! We found your keys, girl!!! They circled around me. I hadn't felt that old, One of them split himself off from the crowd. "Are these -"he pulled out a ring of keys from his pocket, "your keys? And lo, there was the distinctive bright millennial pink cat keychain dangling off the ring. "Yes,"I whispered. "Oh my god, yes." "EYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY YYYYYYYYYY!!" The cheer went up. Turns out he found them in the bathroom upstairs. I thanked them again profusely. There was a scattered round of "no problems" and then, just suddenly as they descended, they all dispersed, like ships in the night. gatorfisch THIS is boys will be boys Nice Frathouse
Apparently, Ass, and Drunk: snarling-through-our-smiles
 I once lost my keys at a frat house.
 My drunk ass had actually walked home
 without them, pounded on my apartment
 door, gotten let in by my rightfully-
 disgruntled roommate, and proceeded to
 pass out on the couch. Apparently I
 puked in the toilet before passing out
 do not remember
 The next morning, I schlepped back to the
 frat house. I stood there, right in front of
 the front door. This was a novel
 experience for me. I'd never been at a frat
 house in broad daylight before.
 A boy, presumably, of the house, asked
 me what I was doing.
 "I lost my keys in here last night, I called
 back. "I was seeing if I could go in and
 look for them?"
 He opened the door and gestured for me
 o come in.
 "Go wherever you want."
 I'd never seen a frat house post-party
 Derore. Wandering up the stairs a
 by
 hungover and still-drunk frat boys
 sandals and gym shorts, seeking out food
 and showers like moths to a porch light.
 A few of them threw puzzled glances my
 way. I'm sure they thought I was some
 post-bacchanalia hallucination.
 I entered one room where a boy was
 drunkenly watching some Old Yeller-
 esque movie on a tiny TV in the corner of
 his room from his bed.
 "Do you like dog movies?" he asked, voice
 from the fact that his face was squished
 against his pillow and half-buried by his
 blanket.
 I told him I did.
 e mumbled again, pleased, and asked
 what I was doing. I told him I was looking
 my keys.
 "Sorry, I haven't seen any keys around
 bere
 I didn't doubt him.
 Twenty minutes had passed. I'd searched
 just about every bedroom and nuclear-
 at dumn-site of a bathroom in that
 house. I'd given up on ever finding my
 keys and was prepared to beg my
 roommates' forgiveness and get a new
 set copied.
 As I stood there in the hallway, silently
 a particularly
 burly frat boy approached me.
 "You need help with something?
 "I lost my keys here last night and I can't
 find them, I've looked everywhere.
 "What do they look like? I'll put it into the
 group chat. He was already pulling out
 his phone.
 No one ever checks a group chat, I
 thought, but what the hell. It was worth a
 shot. "Um, it's just a ring of keys. The
 keychain is a pink plastic cat, though, like
 yea big. Like bright pink, you can't miss
 He nodded, presumably typing this
 description faithfully into the group chat.
 "Alright, I sent the message out. Good
 luck.
 e turned and left.
 And with that,
 A few moments later, I heard a distant
 and it was getting louder and louder, One
 assumes that how I felt in that moment
 was how Simba felt seeing the wildebeest
 stampede through the ravine as a horde
 large young men all thundered down
 the stairs, making a beeling for me.
 "Someone tell the girl!" One of them
 shouted, faceless in the mob. "Girl! Hey,
 GIRL! We found your keys, girl!!!
 They circled around me. I hadn't felt that
 old, One of them split himself off from
 the crowd.
 "Are these -"he pulled out a ring of keys
 from his pocket, "your keys?
 And lo, there was the distinctive bright
 millennial pink cat keychain dangling off
 the ring.
 "Yes,"I whispered. "Oh my god, yes."
 "EYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
 YYYYYYYYYY!!"
 The cheer went up.
 Turns out he found them in the bathroom
 upstairs. I thanked them again profusely.
 There was a scattered round of "no
 problems" and then, just
 suddenly as
 they descended, they all dispersed, like
 ships in the night.
 gatorfisch
 THIS is boys will be boys
Nice Frathouse

Nice Frathouse